Hedonistics Anonymous

Food for thought

2010-02-09T18:41:00.003-07:00

The million dollar question that stumps the shit out of me all the time: What's the point of marrying a gorgeous chick if you're going to continuously cheat on her anyway?

This is why I need a full-time maid

2010-02-03T21:02:00.005-07:00

Attempted to clear the mountain of books which was threatening to take over my room.

I have this really bad habit of going through my (neat) book cabinet downstairs and digging up reading materials to peruse before bedtime. Thing is, I never put them back. And when I'm downstairs, I'll take out another book. And another. And another...

Until it took me five trips to replace 99% of the books back in the cabinet. Each trip warranted a garbage bag full of books. I didn't want to use a garbage bag, but hey, that was the largest and lightest bag available. I also discovered that I've got too many books, so out goes one year's worth Reader's Digest, Nat Geo mags, a stray Fengshui World mag, and various teenage novels (the serious British variety, not the slutty American ones) all to be donated to my mother's tuition center. I also threw in some proper novels - mostly chick lits and books I know I'll never read again.

I'm still missing one of my Philip Pullman novels... The Subtle Knife I think. I can't remember for the life of me if I read it online or I bought it and left it somewhere in my room. Gah. Still clinging on for dear life amidst the crazy mess is Cecilia Ahern's If You Could See Me Now, Terry Brooks' Magic Kingdom for Sale - Sold!, Neil Gaiman's Mirrormask. I am still missing The Nixie's Song (Book 1 of Beyond The Spiderwick Chronicles) and one more hardcover chick lit which is still sealed in plastic. I have no idea why I bother to even buy chick lit when I hardly ever read them. But I've got my eye on The Demonologist: The Extraordinary Career of Ed and Lorraine Warren by Gerald Brittle (RM81.67 from Acmamall).

ARGH. MUST. RESIST.

One giant leap

2009-12-13T07:40:00.004-07:00

After so long of helping someone achieve his dreams, I figured it's time to work towards achieving my own.

Guess what. It's happening. It's really happening.

Sometimes I get so carried away with the speed and the momentum of it, it scares me. Really it does. It's okay when I'm involved and too busy to think about it, but when I sit and back and take stock of the situation, I'm like, "WHOA, can you believe we're actually doing this?"

What started as regular coffeeshop talk is actually beginning to take shape. It's so exciting, yet so scary at the same time. Unbelievable, yet so real.

*Big grinz* :D Heh.

Chasing hurricanes

2009-11-24T19:22:00.005-07:00

These 2 months have been pretty exhilarating.

On one hand, I've worked harder than I've ever had to before. My working hours are extraordinarily long, sometimes extending to midnight and weekends. Last week I consistently pulled 10 hours a day, often breaking for lunch at around 5pm. Yes, lunch at 5pm. Often combined with a pep talk if the boss is present.

On the other hand, I've been playing hard too. Travelling, clubbing, getting reluctantly reacquainted with alco (I don't care what you guys say, beer is bitter-tasting shit haha), lounging during working hours. I foresee the coming months getting even busier but hey, what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger aye?

...I'll be lounging :)

中國歡迎你 Part Deux

2009-11-01T20:45:00.010-07:00

In China, I...

punched my boss.
had a posh nightclub mami force girl after girl on me.
replaced my Vitamin C with Panadol.
actually wanted to go to church to pray for salvation.
discovered a large pizza from Pizza Hut cost nearly RM70.
found happiness eating RMB1 gong jai meen on short plastic stools by the roadside.
unknowingly stayed in a love hotel.

Welcome to the Nanyang Seascape hotel in Zhu Hai, located 5 minutes away from the Zhu Hai - Macau border. It's the epitome of China... huge, garish Oriental designs, oversized Mak Datin furniture, and THREE different sets of tea cups on the table, all thoughtfully arranged for your comfort and (ahem) pleasure.

Pleasure maximizers for both men and ladies WITHOUT the hassle of a third party nine months later.

Located in the bathroom, just in case.

中國歡迎你

2009-10-25T18:16:00.007-07:00

I'm blogging from Hui Hua International Hotel in Changping, more than an hour's drive from Shenzhen Airport. It's a very, very nice hotel.

My room is seriously big. It's even bigger than my boss' room.

The only difference is that he's got the swimming pool view (read: poolside Baywatch), while I see buildings when I look out of the window.

Not that I'm complaining, really. :)

Each day is different

2009-10-22T21:29:00.007-07:00

Some days I would be busybusybusy till midnight. Other days I would be lounging from morning at Travillion, awaiting orders from the boss who treats every place like an airport. Arrive. Sit down to refuel. Take off. He's got 10 people wanting his attention all at one go. He's got 10 projects to tackle at one go. He's got another 10 more projects waiting in the wings. I've more or less employed Anthony Bourdain's early morning management method. Before I sleep, I do a mental rundown of things to do tomorrow. When I wake up, I repeat the whole thing. By the time I leave the house, I've pretty much got all my ducks sitting in a row.

However, the ducks are pretty capable of changing into chickens or geese once I get to the office. Hence the title, each day is different.

I collected my visa this morning, got my sis to change a whole bunch of currencies for me (I have no idea why China, HK and Macau cannot just stick to one standard currency dammit), and I have some banking stuff to do tomorrow before flying off at night.

Ahh busybusybusy.

When the going gets rough...

2009-07-12T08:29:00.008-07:00

...the tough slips into ignore mode.

Bcause that's the most painless way to deal with unpleasantries in life. At least for me it is. Face it, it takes two to argue. So you rant, I keep quiet. You yell, I keep quiet. You stomp off, I'm not there anymore. Yes, I'm still sitting there but I'm not.

Sarcastic as I am, I seldom snap back in a real argument. I automatically slip into ignore mode. I'm not a fighter. I don't like to fight. Not because I can't. To me, it's a bloody waste of time and energy. The times I DO snap back, I usually end up getting frustrated at myself because I have very high regard for emotional self-control. That's why angry people scare me. Emo people scare me. I can't deal with crying people. I don't like people to touch me. I had a friend who found it funny to sneak up behind me and smack my butt while I was talking to another friend. Guess what, I elbowed her. Oh rather, I nearly did, but luckily I managed to stop mere centimetres from her face when I saw who it was. That's the kind of reflex action I have.

Was chatting with the cousin on Facebook just now and our conversation went something like this:

Me: I'm still not really sure how to deal with uncalled-for anger.

Her: Hahaha me too.

Me: So do you do the "ok calm down, let's talk things through" shit?

Her: I just don't say anything. Let's talk things through sounds too patronizing.

Me: Or do you just say "DUDE GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER NOW!!!!"

Me: Frankly, I don't think anybody wants to calm down when they're angry. They just want to rant and yell at you until they're satisfied. Then apologize after that.

Her: LOL that's just about right.

A feast for the senses

2009-06-14T23:09:00.003-07:00

Watched Visitor Q over the weekend.

Haven't watched this kind of movie in ages - weird fetish sexual crap that Japs seem to excel at. Visitor Q's about this stranger who entered the lives of this really really screwed up family. He screws them up even more to the point of total chaos just to make them realize the importance of being a family. It has nearly every sort of disturbing scenarios - incest, senseless violence, drugs, murder, scat, lactation, necrophilia etc.

Sometimes I think I'm too old for this kind of stuff, but then again, I diligently scour the Net for movies that would shock me senseless. It's not the porn factor, I don't even like that stuff. I'm a voyeur of human depravity in every manner. I want to know how low can a person go. In a bid to shock me some time back, a good friend sent me a link to "2 girls 1 cup", which, for those uninitiated, involves two girls shitting and puking into a cup and consuming the contents.

In a bid to pay it forward, I sent another friend this link: http://kidsinsandbox.net/

Hehe.

Back in Miri, I used to watch bizarre movies on a regular basis until one of my housemates actually told his brother to lock the kitchen knives up in case I decide to murder them one by one in their sleep. Right. They should talk. They're the ones who sit around in their undies, littering every square inch of the floor surrounding the sofa set with beer cans and bottles, and watching disturbingly violent Jap porn... those potential rapists.

The Great Couple Meme with added salt and spices

2009-06-10T23:12:00.004-07:00

Ripped from the demanding bitch herself. Good luck with getting your Vera Wang wedding dress.

P/S: I do not claim all answers to be true.

1. Tell us about the first time you met and your first impression of him/her:-

At Foody Goody kopitiam. We were both on our best behaviour. He didn't smoke. I didn't utter a single obscenity. He thought I was simple and undemanding. I thought he was extremely calm and unsarcastic. Few months down the road, he's getting migraines from my obsession with branded bags and my fragile ego has been ripped to shreds from sarcasm overload.

2. What’s a weird habit or quirk that s/he has?:-

He only goes for haircuts on rainy days.

3. What makes him/her happy?:-

Haircuts. Rainy days. Liverpool winning. Playing Championship Manager on the PC. Money. Seeing me happy.

4. What makes him/her sad?:-

Lack of money. Not seeing me for a few days. Seeing me sad.

5. What makes him/her angry?:-

Hot weather. Backstabbers. People who repeatedly make the same mistakes.

6. What excites him/her?:-

Big football matches. Going on trips with me.

7. Tell us something funny about him/her:-

The first time he received an sms from "Angie" inviting him to go for drinks, I threw a tantrum because I don't like my man to go drinking with unknown chicks.

Then I found out that Angie was short for Angelo, his best friend, who's a guy.

8. What’s s/he like at home?:-

Asleep. This guy is a sleepaholic.

9. What’s s/he like at work/school?:-

Apart from a sleepaholic, this guy is a workaholic with the best work ethics I've seen. He churns out twice the daily quota of reports compared to his other colleagues. He works 7 days a weeks. Tomorrow's work will be done today.

10. Describe his/her room:-

Quite spacious. Has a tv cabinet and a full sofa set. There's a computer table (with a computer on it of course) and a small stand tucked against the wall with a raggedy bible opened to Psalms I think. Mother Mary is looking down at you from the wall. The only thing missing is the bed.

11. What’s his/her best friend like?:-

Skinny. Big eyes. Pockmarked face. Reasonably good conversationalist.

12. Do you know who s/he hates the most?:-

Backstabbers.

13. Have you met his/her exes?:-

Seen pictures only. But I'm not worried.. I'm way cuter.

14. Do his/her parents like you?:-

Not after his mother asked me, "Wahhh, my son also got people want arh..?" and I quickly retorted, "Don't get me wrong honey, I'm just in for the money."

15. What’s the first thing s/he would do or say if s/he fell down and scraped their knee:-

He'll just ROAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

16. What would s/he do in an emergency situation with other people involved?:-

Light up a cigarette and complain about the lack of airconditioning.

17. Which shop would s/he spend the most time at in a shopping mall?:-

PC shop, electrical goods shop, FOS, sports shop. Supermarket if he has to do grocery shopping.

18. What would s/he have for a typical breakfast?:-

Rice. Pau. Rice. Kaya toast. Rice. Fried sausages. All washed down with a tall glass of kopi peng.

19. Where would s/he want to go for dinner?:-

Any place that serves rice and allows smoking.

20. what kind of movie would s/he choose at the cinema?:-

Movies that involves fast cars, gambling and James Bond.

21. Describe his/her taste in music:-

Very mainstream. Basically overplayed stuff you hear on the radio. Oh, and Laura Pausini.

22. If s/he wasnt going out with you, who would s/he be going out with?:-

Angie.

23. What item in his/her wardrobe would you like to burn:-

Anything with holes in them. And his gold Barcelona football jersey. He doesn't know it, but I hate that color. It's very unflattering. He's going to kill me when he reads this.

24. What is s/he good at?:-

Ordering people around ala taiko. Being stubborn and sarcastic. Sleeping. Buying me icecream and chocolates when I'm depressed.

25. What is s/he totally horrible at?:-

Being romantic. I tell him, "B, say something nice to me!"

His reply: "Something nice."

26. What’s something about him/her that is annoying/infuriating?:-

If you think that I'm mean and sarcastic, you haven't experienced Mr B's level of sarcasm. He makes Simon Cowell look like a prim Catholic schoolgirl.

27. What’s something that you two fundamentally disagree on?:-

a) Japanese food is good.

b) Buffets are good.

c) Sweet cha kueh is yummy (I hate it).

c) The amount of bags a girl needs.

d) How to discipline kids - I'm into corporal punishment, he believes in reasoning out.

28. What’s something that you two agree whole-heartedly on?:-

a) Liverpool FC

b) Our wedding rings are going to cost less than RM500 for both.

c) Honeymoon at Anfield.

29. Is s/he possessive?:-

Not really. I'm more possessive than him.

30. Why would s/he succeed in life?:-

Because he's got work ethics of a Sherpa and noone would dare to go against him when he's angry.

31. What is the coolest gift that s/he has ever given you?:-

Seiko watch and a KK trip.

32. What is s/he obsessed with?:-

Football, money and making me happy.

33. What does s/he avoid at all costs?:-

Heat is his mortal enemy.

34. What does s/he spend the most money on?:-

a) Food

b) Clothes

c) Me

35. Describe his/her typical Sunday:-

Wake up. Pee. Shower. Go back to sleep.

36. Why would s/he be dangerous?:-

Because he is so big and when he's angry, the expression he has on his face is enough to make you pee in your pants.

37. Tell us about a time s/he looked absolutely gorgeous:-

Well, he's kinda cute when he pretends to be mad at me, but I don't know it. I would be pulling on his shirt repetitively saying in small voice, "sowie sowie.." and he'll be ignoring me.

Then when I've more or less given up, he'll look at me, stick his tongue out and grin.

Very exasperating.

38. What’s something about him/her that would surprise all of his/her friends?:-

Despite his cranky bulldog demeanour, B can very very affectionate and manja. He's even more touchy feely than I am.

39. What do you love most about him/her?:-

When he buys me chocolate without me having to ask for it.

40. The biggest lesson you have learnt from loving your partner:-

a) Patience is a virtue.

b) Silence is golden.

c) Never interrupt him when he's working or having a nap, unless I'm seriously starving.

Christians vs one born-again atheist.

2009-06-05T09:26:00.005-07:00

**WARNING: This post contains religious elements that may or may not (but most likely may) be considered offensive. Don't read if you're the holy schmoly type. Don't. If you're the stubborn sort that enjoys defying orders, then consider yourself duly warned.

Attended MK's mother's funeral this morning.

Seemed like it was only last week when I visited her at the hospital... and despite being weak and all, she could still talk and laugh and give praise to the Lord.

Which really got me thinking, if I were to die of some incurable illness, I would feel EXTREMELY cheated by God. I'm referring to cases like a non-smoker dying of lung cancer, or a non-drinker dying of liver failure. I mean, if that happened to me, I would be so pissed. Really. They say God is merciful... but if he played cruel jokes like this, would He still be considered merciful?

Christians have so much faith in life after death. I don't know, I'm in no position to tell them otherwise because I'm very much entombed in logic. Like the whole evolution vs creationism theory... sorry, I just can't buy the whole Adam and Eve thing. It reads like a fairy tale to me. And the whole concept of life after death, heaven and hell, is just too whimsical. I find it easier to believe that when you die, basically you fail to exist anymore. Or rather, to put it delicately, you become part of the earth. And your soul? Where does it go? Nowhere. It dies with your body.

My parents, the new Christians, are forever trying to re-evangelize me. They find it difficult to tell their church friends that their eldest daughter has reverted back to her worldly (haha), atheistic ways and horror of horrors!.. has stopped even trying to believe in God. We had this conversation over dinner one night.

Dad: Why have you stopped going to church?

Me: Why are you asking me this now? You know I have not stepped into church for the past, what, 2 or 3 years already.

Dad: But what is the main reason you have stopped going to church? Are you afraid of God?

Me: No. I'm just not interested.

Dad: But there HAS to be a reason.

Me: Fine. I find the whole Christian thing too boring for my taste.

Dad: Ahhhhh... so you don't understand the teachings?

Me: I do... I just find it boring. And church people are just so... pushy. They're forever trying to evangelize you. And you have to put on this fake happy face in front of them because they all always look so damn happy. Like they're high on something. It's scary.

Dad: So it's not the teachings, it's the people right?

Mum: Why don't you try attending some other church?

Me: It's not a matter of switching church! I'M JUST NOT INTERESTED OK.

Dad: You should give it a try. Don't give up before you even try.

Me: Why don't you ask me to try some other religion?

Dad: Well, obviously we can't do that.

Me: Yes you can. Try it. Talk to me like a normal human being and not some holy roller. Say to me, you're my daughter and I love you no matter what religion you choose because I just want you to be happy. SAY IT.

Dad: I'll be happy if you start going to church.

Me: I'm sorry dude, that's not the right answer.

Sis: *trying to be diplomatic* Maybe it's not the right time for her to make this decision.

Dad: You're right. Her time will come one day.

Me: Excuse me, I'm still in this conversation. If you guys are going to start talking about me in third person context, then I'll take my dinner to the living room thankyouverymuch.

Stupid is as stupid does

2009-06-02T07:36:00.007-07:00

Use ISA Against Chin Peng's Supporters - Association

KUALA LUMPUR, June 1 (Bernama) -- The Ex- Servicemen's Association has called on the government to use the Internal Security Act (ISA) against anyone, including politicians, who proposed or supported a move to allow former communist leader Chin Peng to return to Malaysia.

Its president, Datuk Muhammad Abdul Ghani, also described such quarters as communists for attempting to bring in the communist ideology into the country.

He hoped the government would take stern action against any politician or those attemptiong to bring Chin Peng into the country.

"If possible, use the ISA. We do not want the communist ideology to grow in Malaysia," he told a press conference here Monday.

He said in a peace treaty and the dissolution of the Communist Party of Malaya in December 1989, the communist insurgents had agreed to stay in southern Thailand.

"If they want to return to this country, they will have to comply to the law and undergo a rehabilitation process.

"However, we, as ex-servicemen, will feel insulted if they were allowed to return as Malaysian nationals," said Muhammad, who also urged the government to review the pension paid to retired soldiers who sustained permanent disability in the war against the communists.

Meanwhile, ex-serviceman Corporal Muhammad Sham Harun who lost his sight in an operation against the communist insurgents in Perak in 1975, does not harbour any love lost for the communists.

"If I ever see him (Chin Peng) again, I will dig his eyes out so he can feel what I feel.

"There must be something that makes him want to come back, or even spread the communist ideology. If he is allowed to return, then our sacrifices are futile," the 55-year-old told a press conference.

Mohamad Sham retired from the army in 1994 and currently receives a RM429 monthly pension.

For Rosli Adnan who lost his legs during the war with the communists in Grik, Perak, in 1978, Chin Peng's return would cause misery to many ex-servicemen and their families.

"It's better he stays out of the country. His return will hurt our feelings," said the 50-year-old who receives a monthly pension of RM274.

-- BERNAMA

HAIHHHHHHHHHH EVERYTHING ALSO MUST USE ISA. DO THIS ALSO ISA. DO THAT ALSO ISA. I THINK I WRITE THIS POST ALSO CAN KENA ISA.

THESE PEOPLE DON'T EVEN KNOW WTF IS ISA AND THEY SIMPLY SAY ARREST PEOPLE UNDER ISA.

BODOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I FOR ONE DO NOT CARE IF CHIN PENG COMES BACK TO MALAYSIA. YEAH SURE HE USED TO BE A COMMUNIST LEADER, BUT THAT WAS IN THE PAST. NOW HE'S JUST A SAD OLD MAN. IF MALAYSIANS WANT TO BE SO CALCULATIVE, WHY DON'T WE BAN THE JAPS FROM COMING TO MALAYSIA? AFTER ALL, THEY FUCKED US UP ROYALLY IN THE 2ND WORLD WAR. DON'T EAT SUSHI.. DON'T EAT SASHIMI... LET'S ALL BURN HELLO KITTY! AND THOSE STUPID AH LIANS WHO CAMWHORE WHILE DOING KAWAII POSES SHOULD HAVE THEIR EYES DUG OUT, HANDS CHOPPED OFF AND SENT TO KAMUNTING UNDER ISA TO BLEED TO DEATH!!!

OR LET'S GO FURTHER BACK IN HISTORY AND SCREW THE BRITISH FOR RULING OUR COUNTRY! LET'S SHIT ON THE UNION JACK AND BAN IMPORTS OF BRITISH PRODUCTS! DESTROY YOUR BURBERRY BAGS, PEOPLE! SET FIRE ON MARK & SPENCERS, TOPSHOP AND DOROTHY PERKINS! IF NOT, YOU WILL BE CAPTURED UNDER ISA AND PUT AWAY FOR 100 YEARS!!!!

AND! I HAVE NOT TOUCHED ON THE DUTCH AND PORTUGUESE YET!

Now you see how ridiculous this whole issue is? Members of the Ex- Servicemen's Association should just go fucking hang themselves for talking through their asses.

This is where I stand

2009-05-14T20:01:00.002-07:00

When shit hits the fan, I instantly build defensive walls so thick and so tall that even I have trouble climbing out myself.

Thing is, I'm beginning to like it in here. The peace and tranquility helps temper the discontentment somewhat.

So yes, you got what you want from me at a price. Like a favourite person of mine commented recently, it's better to be cynically paranoid than naively stupid. Better to purge all toxicity from my life now than let it sink in and become permanent. Also, I don't like looking into the eyes of snakes.

Another clueless person I'm fleeing from is just as I described... permanently clueless. I don't doubt that we all have our own episodes of cluelessness, but this person is such a daily blur sotong, it's a permanent case of open-mouth-enter-foot, to the point where the words that come out start taking on a spiteful, malicious tone.

I am an extremely non-confrontational person. I WILL apologize and overlook alot of matters just to ensure peace. Until I have to confront someone, it's usually a big freakin deal to me. And it doesn't help that I'm slightly on the paranoid side these days haha.

I want pho like NOW!

2009-05-06T21:14:00.004-07:00

Let's take a break from the hustle and bustle of exhausting juvenile dramaramas and focus on helping me find Vietnamese food in Kuching.

You know that I'm pretty desperate already because I didn't even bother to put "good" between "find" and "Vietnamese". It has come to the point where any semblance of Vietnamese food would do. I'm willing to settle for 60% authenticity okay... sad right?

The reason behind this madness is Melbourne. See right, in Melbourne there are tons of Vietnamese restaurants serving extremely delicious authentic Vietnamese cuisines. While in Melb, I had the fortune to try really good pho bo (beef noodle soup) at Preston Market.

It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooo fucking good. "Hor fun" with beef slices and fresh basil floating in a huge bowl of sweet, salty, slightly tangy beef broth. You squeeze a wedge of lemon into the soup and topped with fresh crunchy breansprouts and the first mouthful is mouthgasm at its finest and most intense. It's like going away and coming back all at once. Crazy and comforting. And definitely the stuff desperate food cravings were made off.

Now I'm left with a pho-craving the size of Africa and no solution for it.

Help? Anyone?

Birthday cupcakes

2009-04-27T04:59:00.004-07:00

Guess what I got from my beloved cousin for my birthday?

HAM:SAP CUPCAKES!

My grandmother said that this is a wo niu.

Then I asked her, "If this a wo niu, where are the antennas?"

She answered, "Gor leong chee yeh, mm chee tit chor hei pin si hor?"

Head over to her blog to read all about it. You'll be amazed at her unsound creativity.

THANK YOU CUPPYCAKES!!!!

one day

2009-04-24T08:05:00.004-07:00

you might just wake up

pick up the phone

dial my number

only to have the operator telling you

that the number you dialled is no longer in service

because i've truly upped and left

one day

it might just happen

Now to make me happy...

2009-04-19T08:15:00.003-07:00

12 more days to my birthday!!!!

My wishlist:

~~Cornelia Funke's Inkheart trilogy~~

Gifted by colleagues - slenz, mami jarum and miss wong. Thank you!

Dinner at Sheraton Four Points

COMPULSORY Japanese buffet

Let's do this one after the Lundu trip. You guys know who you are :)

Long wallet

With tons of credit card slots and exterior coin compartment.

Clutch

At least 12 inches long, solid make, and can hold both my camera and my handphone.

While composing the wishlist, I typed "bag" down thrice and erased it thrice because I know I have too many, but then again how can one have too many bags?

Lazy (too much so)

2009-04-15T00:01:00.004-07:00

The title sums my life up at the mo.

All I want to do is play online games - hunt freakin mice and conquer virtual villages.

That, and the constant stop.rewind.play of the memory of your lips nuzzled against the back of my neck at 4-something a.m in the freezing, ultra-sexy hotel room nearly a week ago.

Excuse me folks, the mice are calling.

Pick pack

2009-04-06T23:39:00.002-07:00

When it comes to packing a suitcase, most people pack their clothes first.

Not me.

I start from chargers - for my Nokia and Sony E phones, my Nintendo DS and my camera.

Then I pack my universal power adapter. This is a MUST. You have no idea how it feels like to be stuck in a dingy hotel in Hadyai with a charger and a rapidly dying phone in your hands, but you can't do anything because apparently the hotel's electrical socket is only meant for the flat-legged two-pin plug. Also the adapter doubles up nicely as an extra socket.

Then I move on toiletries - shampoo (I never use hotel shampoo), body wash (I refuse to use bar soap), facial cleanser, toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush, tweezers, razor, moisturiser, and nail clipper. For some reason, my nails tend to chip when I'm traveling, so either I trim my nails really short before I leave, or I lug a nail clipper along.

I need my books. At least 3. I read too bloody fast. Right now I'm halfway through the "Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood".

Oooh, I almost forgot medication. Simple stuff - Panadol, diarrhea pills, band-aids, oral rehydration salts. But this round I'm not bringing any... maybe just my Redoxon soluble vitamin C tablets.

Only then I pack my clothes.

I'm off to KK tomorrow... wheeeeeeeeeeeee!!! :)

KNNCCB x10000000000000

2009-03-27T04:11:00.003-07:00

I.AM.SO.FREAKIN.MAD.

I'm suppose to be a happy gurl today because later I'll be going to Islamic Cafe for tandoori chicken and cheese naan and I'm also happy because I know that in my fridge I've got the bestest, YUMMIEST lor mai kai (glutinouse rice and chicken wrapped in lotus leaf) that my aunts from S'pore brought back.

I tell you, the lor mai kai is to die for. So freakin yummy can die on the spot writhing from foodgasm. Must be the salted egg yolk they put inside.

Just now when I got home I raided the fridge and I was cussing and and on the verge of hysteria because WHERE THE FUCKING HELL IS MY LOR MAI KAI WHERE WHERE WHERE??!?!?!

Then when my mother came home, she told me she passed it to her friend to steam it for her lunch tomorrow.

WHAT THE FLYINGGGGGGGGGGGGG FUCK OK... ALL 3 OF MY PRECIOUS LOR MAI KAI IS GONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

I told my mum that she's horribly evil person. And she just said, "No more already, what to do?" and walked off.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Down dog

2009-03-22T23:58:00.004-07:00

Bobby came down with a bout of food poisoning last week because whenever we off-leash him to do his business, that silly boy would sneak off to the neighbour's house to eat whatever scraps of food being left out for the strays. No matter how much I scream or whack him, he'll still do it, given the chance.

Dumb dog.

I wouldn't care so much if he did not suffer any ill effects from his disgusting snacking habits, but he DID and we had to make two trips to the vet which cost me RM72 for shots, antibiotics and appetite stimulants because Bobby's throat was infected and swollen and he couldn't eat.

If RM72 could cure him on the spot, that money would have been well-spent but nooooooooo... I had to deal with his appetite loss and everyday brought forth the horrible game of Let's Guess What His Royal Highness Would Eat.

He wouldn't eat his raw meat.

He wouldn't eat his kibble. Even kibble soaked in liver soup.

He wouldn't eat bread.

He wouldn't eat yogurt wtf. I tell you, all the yogurt in my fridge is for the dogs. Don't anybody touch them yo.

The only thing he would eat is thoroughly cooked chicken liver and raw eggs.

It was like living with a ultra-finicky lapdog (Iwene, now I know how you fking feel!). Throughout the ordeal, Brandy became the official food disposal unit, often finishing Bobby's food after her own. And I know Bobby's food poisoning didn't come from consuming raw meat because Brandy was fine and dandy all along.

Anywayyyyyyyy Bobby is okay now. Brandy is... fatter now. And I'm poorer now. Boohoo.

P/S: It just occured to me that it would take 14 visits to the doctor for me to rack up a RM72 bill on the old AIA co-payment plan. Thank goodness for company-provided medical insurance.

Ultimate football betrayal

2009-03-18T21:01:00.006-07:00

When a certain very femes Kuching blogger recently announced that he has switched from being a Chelsea supporter to a MU supporter, I was aghast.

I had this terrigible, horrigible and even vegetable feeling of utmost betrayal. To add injury to the insult, this blogger is a GUY who claimed to have the biggest BALLS on earth. Coconut-size ones, if I do recall correctly.

There are many, many things in life that you can change. You can change your job, your house, your car. You can change your name, your food order, your partner, your hairstyle, your underwear.

But you never ever, ever switch loyalty when it comes to football. Ever. And if you do, God have mercy on your traitorous soul.

I know some people choose to support a team because of peer pressure. Maybe for a girl, it could be because her boyfriend is a football fan, or this particular team happen to have an X number of hot players, which is equal to or greater than the sum of Y + Z combined. I know this very well because the very first time I chose to support Liverpool was back in '96. MU beat Liverpool 1-0, David James was the hot goalkeeper and I always had a thing for supporting the underdogs. MU won the game, but Liverpool won my heart. Oh, and it helped that they had hotter players too. David James was bald back then and he looked like Tyson Beckford. Jamie Redknapp was poster boy handsome. Stan Collymore was hot. Patrik Berger was hot. Compared to MU who only had Beckham? Blehhhhhh.

If you think this is a bimbotic method of choosing a football team, let me tell you this: I had an ex who supported Chelsea because his favourite colour is blue. Go figure. Anyway, if it wasn't for Liverpool, I would've supported Chelsea because back then Zola was kinda cute. And Chelsea won me quite abit of money, but that's a story for another day.

Anyway, for the record, I support Liverpool. And Argentina for the World Cup. And when it comes to football, I don't switch sides. Ever.

Ken Lee is soooooo yesterday

2009-03-15T19:02:00.005-07:00

No thanks to Kurt's link, I damn near bust my bloody stitches watching this:

Hing you must watch this ok!!!!

And no, I didn't watch it till the end. Don't dare.

And ze evil toofz iz out!

2009-03-15T02:22:00.006-07:00

The surgery was an anti-climax.

The needle was not as scary as I thought. I've had more painful mouth ulcers.

My dentist is seriously skilled. He was referred to me by a colleague who had a seriously impacted wisdom tooth. All the dentists she went to either refused to take up her case, or referred her to the SGH dental specialist, until one referred her to THIS dentist.

Coincidentally, my gay friend also recommended this dentist to me.

Anyway, the dentist told me that if I went to SGH to get my impacted wisdom tooth extracted, chances are they'll cut through my jaw bone, which would result in serious swelling and extreme pain. He also told me that he never cuts through the jaw bone and as a result of his non-invasive surgery, most of his patients experience zero to extremely mild swelling.

He drilled my tooth into half before extracting the bits separately. From the time I entered the room to when I left, the whole process took roughly 20 mins. I was a nervous wreck. Every time the dentist raised and lowered the chair, I visibly flinched. Every time the dentist brought a new apparatus near my mouth, I clammed up and used my hands to cover my lips.

I remember that when the dentist drilled my teeth, I smelled burning skin. Like "chau tah" smell.

I remember the assistant not really knowing how to hold the saliva sucker thing properly, and I looked like I had a water fountain coming out of my mouth.

I remember emitting a small whimper when I saw the dentist holding the sutures because I've never had stitches before and the idea of some part of my body being sewn up is just... gross.

Obviously I've watched wayyyy too many movies like this one:

The movie in which two teeange girls were invited to attend a party by a stranger online AND THEY ACTUALLY WENT. Look what happened in the end. Hah!

The next shittiest part kicked in when the anaesthesia wore off. It was like... being kicked in the face by a donkey. My whole jaw was ultra-sensitive and painful, and to top it off, the pain gave me a headache. That was when I made ibuprofen 400mg my newest best friend. Sorry mefenamic acid, your 250mg just didn't cut it.

Anyway, I didn't eat anything since my lunch of watery porridge on yesterday till about noon today. Still on watery porridge and mushy disgestive biscuits soaked in hot water, but I did sneak a little chocolate. Not my fault ok, I've gone 24 hrs without a cigarette!

Surprisingly, I'm experiencing minimal pain even without painkillers. I just feel icky when I feel the stitches pull slightly on my gums when I turn my head too fast. Should be able to do semi-solids tomorrow. I'm sick of eating baby food.

For once...

2009-03-13T20:41:00.003-07:00

I am eating wayyyyyy slower than my sister.

I ordered a large KFC whipped potato for dinner and could only managed to finish half.

It took me nearly an hour to eat four har kau. <-- saddest thing in the world.

I want to eat McVites digestive biscuits but I can't.

I want to eat Cadbury Rum&Raisin dark chocolate but I can't.

I want to eat icecream but I don't know if I can. I don't dare to try also.

Heck, I can't eat anything. :(

Swallowing leads to pain leads to headache.

Warm milk is the only food that doesn't hurt that much when swallowed.

I eat by smushing food against my top right molars with my tongue because my jaw can't fully close.

My tongue is rapidly being chewed to death because I use it as a buffer/cushion between my upper and lower jaw.

I have no idea what to eat. My sister suggested porridge water. I don't want to eat porridge because I cannot stand the thought of floating rice particles trapped between my teeth. Even the graininess of mash potato irritates me. I am seriously considering buying those little jars of baby food. Seriously.

Anyhoo, there's no way I can wait till 23/4 to get my tooth extracted. So I'm scheduling another appointment this afternoon with a private dental practitioner.

GAWD I SUPERHATE NEEDLES POKING MY GUMS!!!!!!! @$#%!@#$!@#

*whimper*

Mefenamic acid is my new best friend

2009-03-12T23:52:00.003-07:00

My 38 is impacted. That's what the poliklinik dentist calls my stupid wisdom (oxymoron!) tooth.

It freakin hurts, but my cold-hearted parents wouldn't even dream of cooking porridge for me. No, I eat whatver they eat. If I want porridge, I can cook it myself. My mother even attempted to stop my grandmother for cooking porridge for me ok.

Anyway, in the spirit of extreme scrooge-ness, I opted to go to the poliklinik dentist instead of the private one. RM1 for registration, and my surgery + X-ray will cost RM55. So cheap. The downside is the poliklinik is not equipped to handle surgery, so they referred me to the specialist at SGH.

My little surgery is scheduled on the 23rd of next month.

In the meantime, I'm downing 12 antibiotic tablets (Amoxycillin +Metronidazole combo) a day. Plus MA (see title) for pain. I love MA, it actually works better than Synflex. Takes like 96% of the pain away. The lady manning the pharmacy counter drilled it into me 3 times that I absolutely HAVE to finish my antibiotics. HAVE TO. Cannot not finish. Turf lah, lady... I take my medicines religiously ok, some more I can tell you that Amoxycillin sucks. It does nothing for my cough.

First you sign up, then you start upgrading like a manic

2009-03-11T08:10:00.003-07:00

Apart from Mousehunt (ultimate devil's tool!) on Facebook, I'm currently hooked on Travian. It's relatively (read: deceptively) easy to play, doesn't require any download, and most importantly it's FOC unlike the OTHER devil's tool (read: World of Warcraft).

Basically you get a village, and all you have to do is to upgrade your crops, iron, clay, and lumber. Then you upgrade your main building, and build crannies, granaries, and warehouses. You get beginner's protection for the first six days.

Then you get your first attack.

Since you concentrated too much on upgrading your raw materials, you lack the foresight in building a hidden cranny. You watch in disbelief as your 120 lumber, 134 clay, 100 iron and 60 crop suddenly become 0 lumber, 0 clay, 0 iron and 0 crop.

Consumed with burning rage, you fire a message to your attacker: ASSHOLE!!!

And he replies with a contrite: Sorry.

Pacified, you patiently go about rebuilding your little village. Wisely, you construct a cranny to hide some of your stock. You also remember to upgrade your crops before upgrading other things because, y'know, them workers need to eat also yo.

Then the asshole attacks you AGAIN. He gets away with 70 lumber, which is a ridiculously tiny haul compared to the first attack.

Before the third attack, you upgrade your cranny to level 2.

This time, he comes away with nothing.

Feeling smug, you send him a message: Feeling better now?

Somehow he doesn't reply, but you don't really wonder why.

Btw, I'm on Server 7. :)

Learning the value of privacy

2009-03-04T00:57:00.004-07:00

I get irritated when I come across blog spats/flames/wars and someone eventually blurts out the inevitable "THIS IS MY BLOG! I CAN WRITE WHATEVER I WANT!"

And then when someone else calls the blog owner a stupid cunt, he/she gets defensive with "THIS IS MY BLOG! PLEASE HAVE SOME RESPECT! IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT YOU READ YOU CAN GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!"

If you can write whatever you want, then shouldn't your readers have the right to comment however they like? Having a public blog is like opening the doors of your house wide open for anyone to come in. Nice visitors will make pleasant comments. Not so nice ones will diss you to the high heavens and then piss on your couch. But at the end of the day, it's your fault for opening your house doors for public viewing, right?

Nearly 4 years of blogging has taught me the value of privacy. I believe some things should remain sacred: personal family matters, arguments between you and your other half, office-related matters etc. Every time I start a new blog post, I have to ask myself... will this post incriminate me (or anyone else) in any way in the long term?

Sad to say, the answer is usually yes. Which makes for a boring blog, but a more peaceful life without people talking behind your back.

Which is why when sometimes we chance upon something obscenely funny, and my good friend(s) tell me that I should blog about it, I don't. Because I think that issues like, say for example, you being a man trapped in a woman's body should be kept personal. I mean, I know it's just a freakin joke, but somewhere out there, there might an idiot thinking that you're the next Jessie Chung in the making.

And we don't want that do we, honey?

Sometimes...

2009-03-01T20:06:00.003-07:00

I wish you were someone else.

Election memories

2009-02-26T19:10:00.005-07:00

"We must become the change we want to see in the world"

Mahatma Gandhi

I must admit that I still get slightly teary-eyed when I go back and read about the 2008 general elections as seen through the eyes of bloggers such as 5xmom and anilnetto.com. Read the comments of particular - you can actually feel waves of pride emanating from each and every word.

It's scary when you see Malaysians working together to topple the government. An awesome sort of scary.

I still remembered the first time I voted - it was nervewrecking. The calm solemnity mixed with extreme anxiety. And how I agonized over "what if my [X] touched the edges of the box?!? OMG my vote is spoilt dyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!" Of course it wasn't, but sometimes I take perverse pride in mentally torturing myself like this hahahaha.

The next round I was understandly more pro. I had to drive myself to the Sg Maong community hall because my polling station was different from my parents. Oh, something interesting... there are four people in my family and we've all got different polling stations. Yes, even my sister who shares the same house address as me - she's got the shittiest station... at Stampin.

Anyway, it was raining heavily the morning of March 8, 2008. The bottom of my jeans were soaked through and I wasn't in the best of mood. But I enjoyed observing the people coming in and out of the community hall. I like looking at people and I like to believe that if I look long and hard enough, I would know who they voted for. Sometimes I create imaginary scenarios in my head - that guy is wearing a BN shirt, but I'm sure he secretly votes for the opposition because some people are just closet that way. That old Chinese lady votes for DAP even though she doesn't know who the candidate is because that's what they're taught... red rocket good, blue scales bad. At least that's what my grandmother tells me.

I'm feeling sentimental.

I can't wait for the next elections.

Enter Sandman

2009-02-25T20:16:00.003-07:00

Currently, I am addicted to Neil Gaiman's Sandman comics.

Lately I've been going for smoking breaks with a frown on my face. My friends ask me why the long face, is something wrong?

Nope, everything is fine and dandy. Just that I need to smoke but I also NEED TO FIND OUT WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN ON THE NEXT PAGE!!! Gah.

Initially for my birthday, I thought of gifting myself with the Inkheart trilogy. I have no idea why people don't buy me books for my birthdays. Even last year (or was it year before last.. can't remember) I bought myself Arthur Spiderwick's Field Guide and derived so much bookwormy pleasure from it. I covet books the way Imelda Marcos covets shoes.

Anyhoo, I still want the Inkheart trilogy (RM79.90 from Popular in case you're wondering *devious smile*), but I'm adding The Sandman comics to my wishlist... all 75 issues of it. :)

Btw, for Gaiman fans, you can read issues #1 to #28 of The Sandman HERE.

Woe is me

2009-02-24T01:48:00.002-07:00

It pisses me off royally when I need something right now and I don't have it.

Take for example... last Saturday night, I attended a wedding and I needed a clutch or an evening bag.

I planned on borrowing my mother's MNG clutch, but the color's (teal) a little too garish for my liking. Then I remembered she had an original black Dior tote which she did give to me, but in reality I owned it for roughly 5 seconds (just to examine the controllato card) or something because she kept using it.

I never knew why suddenly she stopped using it.

Now I know.

She broke the freakin handle. Or rather she ripped one side of the freakin handle from the freakin joint. To make matters worse, THE CONTROLLATO CARD IS NO LONGER IN THE BAG!

My mother was never, is never, and shall never be designed for branded bags.

I actually felt so freakin sorry for the bag. At that moment when I was sorrowfully examining the ripped handle, I felt as if I was cradling a puppy with a broken leg. So damn heartbroken okay... *sniff*

Weirdest things I've (over)heard

2009-02-18T23:49:00.004-07:00

(From a middle-aged male at Tiga Roda kopitiam)
"WA CHO SENG LEE, CHO KAU TOR KI... WA KAU BOI KA WA EH MAK CHIOK LUI!!"
Translation: I went into some business and it failed. I ended up borrowing money from my mother.

(From someone's friend to another friend who just broke up)
"So does it pay to be faithful?"

(From someone's best friend while trying to remember the names of the guys she slept with)
"Victor... got. David... no. Peter... no. Andrew... No. Brian... hmm... Ya I think got one Brian."

(From someone's telephone conversation)
"What's the time now? 11:30pm? I don't think there are any pharmacies open at this hour. Yes, I know you just had sex with your girlfriend. No, I don't have any birth control pills. Can you wait till morning? I don't think your girlfriend will get pregnant that fast."

(From a famous celebrity chef)
"If you want to get into the food business, first thing you should know is that this industry breeds assholes. I'm an asshole. You probably should be one too."

(From someone who is sober)
"I dunno what happened! I drive drive drive... suddenly ah the roundabout come very fast at me! Then I drove over the roundabout."

Feel free to add your own.

Ethics in politics, like freedom of speech, is just a myth

2009-02-16T23:14:00.005-07:00

I am a Malaysian citizen. A commoner. I live with my parents, my sister, two dogs and a hamster. I wake up every morning to feed and walk my dogs and head to work after that. At 5pm, I come home from work. Shower. Have my dinner. Maybe go out with my boyfriend or go for drinks with friends. Come home. Shower. Sleep.

This is my life.

This is probably the typical everyday life of the average middle-class Malaysian.

We don't care about the doings (or wrongdoings) of the upper echelons. I mean, sure, we read the papers, surf the Internet, indulge in political gossip and stuff, but that's as far as it goes. It probably makes as much difference to us as, I don't know, Angelina Jolie adopting another kid from some godforsaken third world country, or Lindsay Lohan frenching Samantha Ronson and then denying all rumors of her being a lesbian.

To clarify further, I summarized the whole (recent) Perak hooha in five words: The S***** is an asshole. "S" being the head honcho of the state.

People talk about Minister So-and-So being corrupted, "eating" money. I say so what? Corruption may be very real but really, it's nothing new. If you can't beat them, join them. If people offer you dirty money, and you don't take it, somebody else will. This is reality. This is politics. But you know what, who cares?

What the rakyat really cares about is what affects them directly. Stuff like hikes in petrol prices, rising costs of services and consumer products, privatization of healthcare, retrenchment etc. Malaysians have been a reasonably complacent lot until recently, and the government doesn't really have a clue on what to do. Actually they do... they could reform. Stop cheating the rakyat. Stop teaching the rakyat how to tighten their belts while the wives of those rich hotshots get to go to Europe on shopping sprees. Stop assuming that the rakyat are a stupid uneducated lot by telling them that yes, although we hike our petrol prices, they are still lower than Singapore's. For fuck's sake, the only "natural" resource that Singapore produces is recycled drinking water! Beating people into submission is not answer. Media censorship is not the answer. ISA is not the answer. And blowing little Mongolian ladies up with C-4s is definitely NOT the answer.

Anyway, where were we? Oh yes, corruption.

A note to our beloved politicians: Be as corrupted as you want. Go ahead and eat all the money you want. But not at the expense of the rakyat. Never. I mean, the average Malaysian has to slave like a dog just to make ends meet, and you still want to cheat his money? Don't do that lah. If you want to steal, steal from those rich pricks. Go rob those in the list of top 20 richest Malaysians. Or top 10 in the Forbes list, which is even more impressive ok. Just stop stealing from the poor. Sure it's easy, like taking candy from a baby. But make it a habit and you're just quickening your pace towards your own political death.

Although it has nothing to do with this post, Yasmin Ahmad's SPCA ad almost made me cry

2009-02-15T03:45:00.005-07:00

I sent him an sms yesterday.

I realized I could no longer reel his number off by heart. I actually had to scroll through my contact list. Like wtf right.

It took 3 years for me to accomplish this. 3 bloody years for me to forget his number.

And you know, I'm not even the super-sentimental sort. I wonder how long it takes for emo qings and kueens to forget their past.

They probably never do.

***Now for a public service announcement: View Yasmin Ahmad's SPCA commercial at http://yasminthefilmmaker.blogspot.com. It's freakin touching ok. Do your bit to prevent cruelty to animals and spread the word.***

Got a wedding to attend to this coming Saturday. The bride armtwisted me to attend her church ceremony. Gah. I've never attended a wedding ceremony at church before because:

I rather sleep in.
I don't believe in getting dressed up for something that lasts just an hour.
I'm pessimistic that way.

Some more it's a Catholic wedding and the church is un-airconditioned. Thank gawd it's only for about an hour. Any longer than that, I'd probably melt into something akin to unholy water.

Anyhoo, one of my colleague coaxed me to attend Catholic classes with her in April. Now, for the record, if I DO attend classes, it's just so that IF and ONLY IF I do marry B, we'll get to marry in church in holy matrimony with bells and whistles and the whole nine yards. If not, we'll only get the priest's blessings, like Jessie Chung did.

For the record again, I cannot see myself as a Catholic because the Baptists got me first and although I'm such a "worldly" person (according to MK), I find that their teachings make more sense. Not that I'm against the Caths or anything, I mean, whatever makes you happy, right? I just find that it's not my cup of tea. And I cannot imagine how I will behave in a class where I have to pretend that oh yes Father, I so believe in Mother Mary, the saints and rosaries. Because I freakin don't and I have no idea how to do that ok. You know, I didn't even believe in creationism because evolution makes a hell lot more sense, but now I've accepted that God created the universe and all living creatures, but please, not the Adam and Eve bit. That's like telling me that Harry Potter and his broomstick is real. Now how many Hail Marys do I have to say in order to repent? Oh, and don't forget to dunk me in a bath tub of holy water and pray for my tortured soul while you're at it.

But then hor, the only positive thing about being a Catholic is that I get to choose a new name and I get a freakin cert for it! But only if I REALLY get to choose my own name. God help me if I had to be a Mary or Elizabeth hahahahahahahahahaha. Oh, and I get to buy myself a gold crucifix, eventhough I don't believe it has the power to ward off vampires or pontianaks. I'm just thrilled to be able to accumulate more pieces of gold jewelry. And the hour long services! If they totally do away with the kneeling part, it would be perfect. Baptist churches don't require you to kneel, but their services are sooooooooo long, almost 2 hours. So yes, I love the fact you can get to heaven by just devoting one hour a week.

Just remind me to bring my own cushion for knee pads.

The comment that deserved its own post

2009-02-05T19:06:00.006-07:00

Okay, this post is mainly for Che-Cheh's benefit.

1. If I have a big dog, will I still feed raw?

YES! Actually, Bobby + Brandy's weight = 30kg, which is nearly the average weight of a adult male Golden Retriever (27-36kg). In fact, I wanted to put Bobby on 100% raw diet also. Problem is, I've still got too much kibbles at home. And canned dog food, which used to be Brandy's staple diet. So processed or not, Bobby has to finish them.

Also, Bobby is a bit of an idiot when it comes to raw feeding. He doesn't like raw chicken. He loves raw mince meat though. And I'm not feeling benevolent enough to experiment with other types of meat so soon. So Brandy gets all the chicken, while Bobby eats the raw mince.

Supposing I put both of them on a raw diet, feeding 2-3% of total body weight per day, my food cost a month would be:

3% of 30kg = 900g

1kg raw mince meat (pet food variety) = RM3 per kg

900g raw mince = RM2.70 per kg

1 month = RM2.70 x 31 days = RM83.70

As for the bones and organs:

Chicken drumsticks = RM8.50 per kg

Liver = RM5 per kg

I bought 4 medium-sized drumsticks for RM5 at Cold Storage, which means I'm paying upscale price. I'll probably pay less if I get them from the market or normal supermarket. So on average, 1 drumstick = RM1.25. If I feed one drumstick every other day, my cost will be RM19.40 per month. If I feed one drumstick every day, it will be RM38.80.

Chicken liver is very cheap. At slightly more than half the price of drumsticks per kg, even if fed every day, cost will be maybe RM20 per month.

So in total, meat + drumsticks + liver = RM150.

But that's a very conservative estimate. Actually I pay less than that because I feed less than 1% of body weight. Reason being, chicken drumsticks come with meat too, which means I have to cut the weight of mince meat, or else I'll be over feeding the dog.

So in reality, I'll be feeding my 30kg dog roughly 500g raw mince daily, which will cost RM46.50 month. If I add in a drumstick and some liver EVERY DAY, it will bring the monthly total to RM105.30. Cheaper than a 6.5kg bag of Innova Evo. :)

Of course, there are so many other ways to lower cost. Feed breast meat + bones instead of drumsticks. Feed chicken wings instead of drumsticks. Or even chicken necks. The sky's the limit.

2. But I can only go to the market on weekends.

I never go to the market. I buy all the stuff I want from supermarkets. I'm a sucker for comfort. As long as you find yourself a supermarket or hypermarket with a meat counter and there's a guy behind the counter who can slice meat for you, you can definitely buy raw mince meat for pet food. Just ask for "pet food", the meat guy should know.

Then you go home and portion the meat into little bags and pop the whole lot into the freezer. In the morning, take one bag out to defrost. By evening, the meat is soft enough to be fed. If you get a frozen bag of pet food, just ask the meat guy to slice the meat up into smaller blocks so that it's easier for you to pack individually at home.

Once, I bought 2 bags of frozen mince (2kg per bag) and I forgot to ask the meat guy to slice it up for me. When I got home, I spent more than an hour hacking through frozen meat. It was like trying to free a woolly mammoth from the ice. It was painful. My fingers were numb and blistered at the end. So don't be afraid to ask the meat guy for help.

3. That's how you get clear pee?

Uhm, yes. Well, the more water you drink, the lighter your pee will be. The same rule applies to dogs too. The trick is to find something to add to water so that he'll drink more than usual. In Brandy's case, it's a teaspoon of raw mince added to a little hot water and then topped up with drinking water. She drinks roughly a big cup of soup before every meal.

My colleague adds a little glucose to her dog's drinking water to entice him to drink, but I've never tried that before. Basically, you work with whatever you have or whatever it takes to make your dog drink more.

4. Although dogs can't process green leaves, I still give them as treats.

Lucky you. My dogs don't eat fruits or vegetables because Bella gets first priority on anything un-meat. And I'm not strict on dogs eating greens. Maybe because I'm not a huge fan of vegetables myself. Haha.

The continuing saga of Miss Brandy... continues

2009-02-04T23:28:00.002-07:00

It has been almost 3 weeks since I started Miss Brandy on her raw diet.

Along the way, I modified her diet here and there to suit her needs and mine too. I had to, because Brandy is a special-needs dog (yes very speshul) who doesn't like to drink water. But basically, raw meat and bones still make up the bulk of diet.

For breakfast, Brandy gets:

1. Soup (1 cup hot water + 1 teaspoon raw mince meat for flavor).

2. A hard-boiled egg (with bits of shell attached for calcium).

I choose not to feed raw eggs to my dogs because of the biotin (Vitamin B) hype. Apparently, raw egg WHITES contain an enzyme called avidin which can bind biotin and prevent it from being absorbed by animals, which ultimately leads to Vitamin B deficiency. The only way to destroy avidin is through cooking the egg whites. Anyhoo, I did my research and discovered that dogs that are fed whole raw eggs do not suffer from biotin deficiency because something in the raw egg yolk prevents that from happening.

Whatever, I don't have the time to separate the whites for cooking and leave the yolks raw. So she gets cooked eggs and she lurves them.

For dinner, Brandy gets:

1. Soup (same as breakfast)

2. Raw mince meat

3. On alternate days, she gets a whole chicken drumstick and offal. This week she's eating gizzards because CCK Cold Storage didn't have chicken liver for sale. Gizzards, though slightly more expensive, are easier to deal with and doesn't have the strong bloody, iron-y smell that liver has.

Raw mince meat (the type that butchers sell as pet food) are so damn cheap at RM2-RM3 per kg. 2 kgs can last Brandy more than a week. Even with the cost of chicken drumsticks and offal in, it's still a hell lot cheaper than buying kibble. I'm not against people feeding their pooches kibble, but I wish petfood manufacturers would stop labelling their products as "organic", "natural" or "holistic". Face it, there's nothing natural, organic or holistic about kibble. It's just processed food. It's like buying "wild salmon" in a can. By the time it's in a can, who cares whether it's wild or farmed or hand-reared to do circus tricks in your bath tub? Until I personally see that the salmon has been caught from icy Alaskan rivers or Norwegian fjords, you can take your "wild" label and stuff it where the sun don't shine.

Now, tell me, do you believe that McDonald's uses "premium" beef in your Big Mac? :)

Oops, back to the main topic of conversation.

I'm looking into lowering the already low cost (IMHO) of Brandy's meal. My father loves what raw food is doing to our shih tzu, but he keeps mumbling that drumsticks are expensive (But dad, a week's worth of drumsticks cost less than a meal at McD's!) and so he suggested feeding Brandy solely on raw mince meat and chicken carcasses. For those who do not know what chicken carcasses are, no, they're not roadkill. They're whole chicken skeletons usually sold for making soup stock. Since mince meat already has a nice meat-to-fat ratio, I just need to add in the raw bones and chicken carcasses work just fine. Not to mention, they're dirt cheap (according to my father).

So after nearly 3 weeks on her new diet, Brandy:

1. Is fitter. Last time her top speed is a mild trot for a 20-30 seconds before collapsing on the road. Now she gallops like the world's shortest pony and is my father's newest jogging partner. Think you can outrun her? Think again.

2. Produces better poopies. They're small and compact. Super easy to clean up. Doesn't stink and attract flies. Poop quality usually the major difference between processed food and raw fed dogs. Dogs on kibble diet will always poop more and their poop tend to smell. Pooping more is not necessarily a sign of good health. It shows that food is not being fully absorbed into the system. Raw fed dogs, in contrast, have very small poops despite being fed alot.

3. Fur is a lot better now. On a kibble diet, the fur on her back was dry and faded-looking. A week ago I told my colleague that Brandy's fur was getting better. Only the part near her tail still feels a little dry.

4. Clear pee. Like seriously tranparent ok. She peed on the garage floor one night and I thought it was a rain puddle until I realized the puddle was made in a spot that has never been touched by rain. This one, however, is probably due to the fact that she's getting a hell lot of fluid from the twice-daily meat broths.

Intellectual depression

2009-01-28T23:44:00.003-07:00

You know how when you were much younger and sex was just a really fun thing to do when you're bored and horny and you didn't even need to fancy the other person to get naked and dirty with each other?

No?

I'm starting to think it's just my depressed mind playing tricks on me.

Anyhoo, I wish my thumb nail was longer so I could try stapling it. Suddenly I have this urge to see if stapler bullets are strong enough to penetrate hard keratin. I've stapled my index finger before by accident. Twice. In the same spot. In a matter of seconds. Yeah, so klutzy I know.

But the stapled thumb nail... methinks it has mucho potential to be the new fashion accessory.

I am seriously beginning to hate CNY.

Cat's just got the cream. Meeeowwww.

2009-01-27T18:38:00.004-07:00

I had the most amazing dream on Monday night.

It was so amazing that I would've happily gone into a coma just so that I could remain in that dream forever.

But I won't tell you what I dreamt.

However, if you're a heterosexual male and your name begins with 'A', then you most probably did feature in my dream. :)

Someone should invent a giant fly swatter to swat horrible little children to death

2009-01-21T01:11:00.005-07:00

Many, many times when I'm out and I see kids misbehaving (running around and screaming like a banshee on fire) and their parents aren't doing anything to curb such behaviour, I would:

Make some loud, biting comment about how parents should teach their kids manners.
Glare and tell the kid to "STOP IT!" if they too close to me.
Glare at the kid (and trust me, I can glare to the point where people have to tell me to stop it or else).
Glare at the parents.
Resort to physical measures. I once boxed a truly horrible 11yo boy with my father's full approval. I was 19. He punched me back. His mum saw it and gave him hell. Of course he screamed out his version of what happened in defense. Of course his mother did not believe him. Heh.

But hor, if I have to, I can be very nice to little kids. Let them sit beside me. Bring them to McDonalds. Let them do whatever they like. Let them think they can get away with shit. We become best buddies. Then I report to their parents. LOL.

Happy Chinese New Year, dearest readers.

The continuing saga of Miss Brandy

2009-01-18T22:44:00.003-07:00

Miss Brandy is probably the best tempered dog I've owned.

With the exception of Banglas or skinny, dark-skinned men, she loves everyone she meets.

Owning Miss Brandy, however, has its downside.

When she joined our family, she suffered from skin problems due to a rather severe flea and tick infestation and horribly matted fur. She was in the midst of heat and kept attracting unwanted attention from other male dogs. She didn't seem to want to eat anything (but still remained fat). We had no idea whether she was vaccinated or not.

We had to shell out quite a fair bit of money to get her spayed, vaccinated, de-ticked, and shaved. Also because she's a purebreed something, we couldn't let her eat Bobby's not-so-premium dog kibble. Then she decided to snub her nose at kibble and we had to feed her fresh milk and canned dog food. After buying lots of canned food, she decided she liked kibble again. Argh.

Recently her left anal gland got severely impacted. According to the vet, this was probably due to her being brought up solely on a kibble diet and she didn't drink enough water. I had to shell out RM35 for two bottles of antiseptic solution and the pleasure of seeing the vet stick his finger up the dog's anus. Some more, the vet told me to express the gland MYSELF once every week. I wanted to say that I don't mind paying him (actually I do, but the grossness factor greatly overruled the money factor) to do it every week but then he cut me off firmly, saying, "It's easy. You can google up how to do it."

Right.

So Brandy was put on a wet food diet. No kibble. No grains. She HATED it. I gave her cooked oats + organic veggie powder every morning to add fiber to her poo and by the third day, she craved solid food so bad, she actually chewed up and ate the tip of the rubber door stopper.

I hated her wet food diet too. Everytime I opened a can of wet dog food, I imagined the amount of preservatives my dog is ingesting. Kibble, I don't quite like it but admittedly it's convenient. But I think even the best quality kibble is loaded with preservatives (even if it's all-natural blablabla). How do you explain kibble not going soft when over-exposed to air for weeks? I know mine don't. I don't even keep my kibble in an airtight container. I pour it into the dog bowl and loosely roll up the bag. Four weeks later, they're still hard and crunchy despite being exposed daily to air.

AND DO YOU NOTICE THAT ANTS NEVER INFEST DOG KIBBLE?

My house isn't ant-free. They infest the kitchen bin. Leave some food on any counter top and less than half an hour later, a small troop of ants will be carrying it away. But fallen kibble on the counter top or on the floor will stay there untouched. And I'm referring to super premium kibble (Innova Evo) which costs around RM120 for a 6.5kg bag. This freaks me out because there are very few things that ants wouldn't eat, and if ants do not recognize kibble as food, then WTH IS KIBBLE???

Anyhoo, I put Brandy on a prey model diet, which is based on providing nutrition through raw meaty bones and offal (organs) alone. No fruits or vegetables because dogs generally cannot digest them unless mashed into pulp. Yesterday I gave her a whole drumstick + 1/2 a piece of chicken liver (both raw) and she loved it.

I don't personally know anyone else who feeds their dogs raw meat (except for my father's mechanic friend) so I got all my information on the Net. Here are some very good links:

http://www.rawfed.com/

http://www.rawfeddogs.net/

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080713150731AA04RUc

Btw, the prey model diet differs from the BARF diet because BARF recommends feeding your dog a combination of ground meat and bones, pulped fruits and vegetables, and supplements. Personally, I can't see myself spending more time on preparing my dog's meal than my own. I'm into Day 2 of Brandy's new diet and I can't get over how easy and affordable it is.

I bought all my stuff from Cold Storage:

Half a chicken (chopped into big pieces)

4 big pieces of chicken liver

3 drumsticks

Total damage to wallet: RM15

I could probably get raw chicken cheaper from Boulevard or Everrise but currently I don't have the patience to deal with the CNY shopping rush. Might as well go to Cold Storage and pay more, but at least I get to shop in comfort. RM15 worth of meat and liver, after separating them into small individual plastic bags, can last Brandy more than a week. And I get the satisfaction of knowing that what she's eating is definitely better and more bioavailable that any cooked or processed food out there.

I'm going to try her on this diet for a month, then send her to the vet for a check up. Hopefully she'll get a clean bill of health this time.

Nice move, dickhead

2009-01-14T20:27:00.008-07:00

Taken from The Malaysian Insider (Jan 15).

[HERE]

Students in mass movement against Israeli atrocities

PUTRAJAYA, Jan 8 —School students nationwide will be galvanised into a mass movement aimed at instilling hatred against Israeli atrocities on Palestinians, said Education Minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Tun Hussein.

Hishammuddin said the mass movement would involve those in the teaching profession and education ministry staff.

“Through the mass movement, the students will be exposed and reminded that the peace, justice and comfortable living environment can be easily robbed by people with greed," he told reporters after presenting the ministry’s new year address here today.

The movement to be launched soon would involve all quarters including non-governmental organisations (NGO) and ministries to make the voice of young Malaysians heard globally.

Hishammuddin said the mass movement was approved at the Cabinet meeting chaired by Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi yesterday. — Bernama

Same issue, taken from NSTOnline

[HERE]

Gaza Under Siege: Ministry plans huge protest by schoolkids

By Regina Lee

2009/01/09

PUTRAJAYA: Nearly all schoolchildren in the country will be mobilised to protest against the Gaza offensive by Israeli forces. Education Minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Hussein said about five million pupils and 360,765 teachers from more than 10,000 schools would be involved.

"This is to create a wave of pressure for the Israelis to stop their violence and oppression of Palestinian civilians."

He said the ministry would be working with the Information, Foreign, and Youth and Sports Ministries, as well as Peace Malaysia, to expand the campaign to a mega scale.

"When we protested against the US invasion in Iraq, we managed to get 200,000 people into Putra Stadium, Bukit Jalil.

"We are confident that youth leaders from political parties, including those in Pakatan Rakyat will join us in this fight against the Zionist regime," he said after his ministry's New Year gathering at Putrajaya International Convention Centre here yesterday.

Hishammuddin said the directive was passed in the cabinet meeting on Wednesday.

Asked on the danger of exposing children to such atrocities, the minister said: "When they grow up, they will have to face global issue like peace, environment and the economic crisis."

He said he would be using the Unesco platform, of which he is an executive board member, to voice out Malaysia's concern over the Gaza crisis.

Nice one, teaching kids to hate. Seriously, how low can you go to ruin the image of the country's (already shitty) education system? What happened to all those "nilai-nilai murni" that we had to memorize in order to get a lousy A in Pendidikan Moral? Is hate a new moral value?

You know, I try to be open-minded about such things but I can't. Thanks to such idiotic teachings and ideas, people like my previous ex (the Malay fella) hates Jews. Once I asked him a hypothetical question: If you see an injured Jewish baby in the middle of the road, would you help him?

He replied no.

I was stunned. I asked why.

Calmly he replied, "Because it's a Jew. Now he's just a harmless baby, but if you help him live, he'll grow up to become a bad person."

"And how do you know that? Have you even met a Jew before?"

"No, I don't have to. I know that all Jews are bad."

YES MR HISHAMMUDDIN, IT'S THANKS TO DICKHEADS LIKE YOU THAT YOUR RACE IS PROGRESSING BACKWARDS.

(Note: The term "progressing backwards" is such an oxymoron but I like it. Negative growth, anyone?)

Press the forward button 5 times. Stop. Repeat.

2009-01-08T01:38:00.003-07:00

Lately, I've been moving at speeds too damn fast for my liking.

Like yesterday, I woke up before 7am to tend to the dogs, get ready for work, head to work before 9am, work (or trying to work), fuss about the CNY decor in the office, out of the office at 5:30pm to buy more decorations, back to office at 7pm to put up the remaining decorations, out of the office at 8:30pm, dinner at 8:45pm, send colleague home, reach home at 9:20pm, showered and was out of the house at 10pm for yamchar session.

I barely even have time to breathe.

Ya sure I could tone down my activities but in some perverse way, I am enjoying myself very much. I think I fear that if I am not in some place at some specific time, I may miss out on something big. Sometimes I think it's a pity there's only one of me because if there were like 5 of me, I could go on a date with you, have drinks with you, go karaoke with you and you, bring my dog to meet yours, and chill out at home with the DS all at the same time.

Pity indeed.

Deck the halls with poo

2008-12-30T01:44:00.003-07:00

I realized I didn't wish any of y'alls a Merry Christmas.

Anyway, I presumed everybody knows how to be merry during Christmas without the greetings, cards, pressies (well, ok not the pressies) and all the hooha.

But have a smashing new year on me, yeah? Don't fuck it up in 2009.

Oh, and I thought it would be mucho interesting to write that my dogs actually got more presents than I did for Christmas.

Since it's New Year's Eve tomorrow, my kind employers have decided to make it Casual Wednesday. And we get to go back at 12:30pm!

For those who do not get the abovementioned benefits, WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA PFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT!!!!!!

Mornington Peninsula

2008-12-17T22:19:00.019-07:00

The bulk of my trip spent touring the Mornington Peninsula, located over 40km southeast of Melbourne. My uncle has a beach house high up on the hills of McCrae.

Didn't have time to scratch "wuz here".

McCrae

The view from the balcony of the beach house. It's actually alot nicer in real life because the sea is really, really clear. My uncle calls it the million dollar view. As in, "Why do you guys keep the curtains closed? I paid so much for this million dollar view and you guys would much rather watch the patterns on the curtains???"

Obviously he has no idea how much Asians hate the sun.

Fancy photography on the beach of McCrae.

The inclusion of my mother's legs in the photo was purely unintentional.

Lighthouse at McCrae.

Sorrento Pier

By the time we reached Sorrento Pier it was 9:10pm.

And it wasn't totally dark yet. I took a similar photo of the pier with my flash turned on and I captured lots of orbs. Hmm.

Murray's Lookout

I can't remember the significance of the lookout but the view from above is spectacular.

One thing I love about Australia:

You can take super crap photos here and they'll still turn out pretty good.

Apparently this is true in New Zealand also.

Arthur's Seat

Chairlift at Arthur's Seat. But it's not in operations anymore due to insurance problems.

Tavern at Arthur's Peak.

Sorrento

Picnic lunch near Sorrento Pier.

This is the first of many more outdoor picnic lunchs to come. But these are the only outdoor picnic photos I have because the rest of the lunches were held in near-freezing temperatures and my fingers would not obey me.

Summer Ridge Strawberry Farm

Sunny Ridge's famous Strawberry Temptation (AUD$12)

Behind: Strawberry Knickerboker Glory (AUD$10)

U-Pick section of Sunny Ridge where, yes, you can pick your own strawberries if you're into manual labour. Don't be deceived, though. You have to pay for what you pick.

More pictures to be posted as and when I feel like it.

Guess who owns 3 pairs of Havaianas sandals now

2008-12-14T10:07:00.008-07:00

I'm back from Melbourne.

Catching an overnight flight from Melb to KL and then hopping onto a connecting flight back to Kch four hours later is hell. Especially when you're flying budget, sitting closest to the turbines, dealing with weather turbulences and have to adjust to the three hours time difference.

It's 4am in Melbourne.

And I'm doing my darndest to stay up to adjust back to M'sian time. I don't want to wake up at the crack of dawn. For the last two weeks, sleeping in means waking up at 6am.

I miss Vietnamese food so much. I WANT BEEF PHO DAMMIT!

Pictures will be uploaded when I've acclimatized.

Move over Foxy, here comes the sexy Chrome!

2008-11-27T05:24:00.004-07:00

I'm proud to admit that Firefox is no longer the browser of my choice.

In fact, I've uninstalled both Maxthon and Firefox browsers at home. I used to love Firefox but its v3.0 is too bulky for my liking, slowing down my already freaking slow office PC.

My web buddy right now is the oh-so-sexy Google Chrome.

I adore its deceptively simple interface and the fact that its memory usage is 10 times less than Firefox's. Oh, and it offers tabbed browsing! Ya, I know almost every web browser out there has tabbed browsing now, but hey, it's my absolute favourite built-in feature.

But what I love most about Google Chrome is its SUPER FAST PAGE LOADING SPEED. If you thought Firefox was fast, you HAVE to try Google Chrome.

Oh, and for the record, I hate Internet Explorer with a vengeance. That stupid browser was one of the last few browsers to implement tabbed browsing. I would've uninstalled it a long time ago if not for the fact that it came with Windows and I don't want to offend Microsoft too much.

My life before 8am

2008-11-20T19:03:00.004-07:00

6:30am - Wake up. Go downstairs to check on the hamster. Wash her potty if its dirty and fill it up with cat litter. Feed the hamster 1/2 a teaspoon of organic veggie powder (RM20 for 100g). Fill her food dish with dry hamster food.

Bella eats Prestige Hamster Nature (RM21.90 + RM8 for shipping). Yes, her food gets flown in all the way from KL.

6:50am - Bring Brandy out for her morning pee and poo.

7:15am - Bring Bobby out for his morning pee and poo. Sis feeds Brandy her medicine and supplements.

7:45am - Feed Bobby his breakfast. He gets 3/4 cup of kibble plus a cup of yogurt. Sometimes he gets mashed bananas, papayas or 1/2 a hard-boiled egg instead of yogurt. This morning I topped his kibble with two tablespoons of doggy milk.

Sis is still in the process of coaxing Brandy to finish her supplement-laced yogurt. As opposed to Bobby who vacuums his food down his throat without hesitation, Brandy is a SUPER PICKY EATER. She doesn't like eggs. She only eats at a certain time of the day (noon, I think). She likes Nutro puppy kibbles, sometimes. She doesn't like milk. She doesn't like all the doggy treats I give to her. She doesn't like rice and meat. And for the past few days, her diet mostly consisted of bread and fruity yogurt.

In order to get Brandy to eat, sometimes my sister will hand feed her. It's a horribly tedious process but we're worried that if we don't, Brandy wouldn't eat at all. I think she eats something like 10 kibbles a day. Which is precisely why I rather walk her than feed her. Walking her is easy. Getting her to eat is a job for someone who has nothing to do the whole day. At the moment, my sister fits the bill perfectly. Haha.

One step closer to being Miss Hilton

2008-11-19T20:47:00.004-07:00

Say hello to the latest member of the family... Brandy.

Isn't she a cutie?

Unfortunately she doesn't look like that at the moment because we had her shaved down. Her fur was overly matted and she had a bit of a tick problem.

Now she looks like a cross between a miniature schnauzer and a dachshund (short stumpy legs).

Never fear, the vet assured us that by feeding her the (expensive) coat supplement that he prescribed, she'll be a beautiful girl again.

I can't wait!

The Paris Hilton in me is -->THIS<-- close to ordering a tiny polka-dotted sundress for her! Teehee.

I do this because...

2008-11-10T06:44:00.004-07:00

...deep down inside, I am a closet Paris Hilton who wants tiny white fluffy dogs (read: Maltese!) so that I can dress them up and tote them around in fake monogrammed LV doggy bags.

Unfortunately all I have is a medium-sized, semi-fluffy, super shedding, off-white mutt.

Still I am determined to play doggy dress-up. It's good that he's white. His fur goes well with most colors. I'm planning to get him a hot pink polo shirt as well as a light blue hoodie which comes with Burberry checkered shorts.

I am, however, a little worried that his perky ears might not exactly be hoodie-friendly.

The great divide

2008-11-05T18:52:00.006-07:00

This is Barack Obama's full victory speech taken from here. Yes it's kinda long, but it's worth reading. Who knows, it might even bring tears to your eyes. :)

"If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

"It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

"It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

"It's the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

"It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.

"I just received a very gracious call from Senator McCain. He fought long and hard in this campaign, and he's fought even longer and harder for the country he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him and Governor Palin for all they have achieved, and I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.

"I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on that train home to Delaware, the Vice President-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

"I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation's next First Lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both so much, and you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the White House. And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother is watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight, and know that my debt to them is beyond measure.

"To my campaign manager David Plouffe, my chief strategist David Axelrod, and the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.

"But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to it belongs to you.

"I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington it began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston.

"It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give five dollars and ten dollars and twenty dollars to this cause. It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy; who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep; from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on the doors of perfect strangers; from the millions of Americans who volunteered, and organized, and proved that more than two centuries later, a government of the people, by the people and for the people has not perished from this Earth. This is your victory.

"I know you didn't do this just to win an election and I know you didn't do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime, two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century.

"Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor's bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.

"The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you we as a people will get there. "There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as president, and we know that government can't solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it's been done in America for 221 years block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

"What began twenty-one months ago in the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you.

"So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers in this country, we rise or fall as one nation; as one people.

"Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House a party founded on the values of self-reliance, individual liberty, and national unity. Those are values we all share, and while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, 'We are not enemies, but friends though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection.' And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your president too.

"And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those who would tear this world down we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope.

"For that is the true genius of America that America can change. Our union can be perfected. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.

"This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight is about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing -- Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

"She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

"And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

"At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

"When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs and a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.

"When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

"She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that 'We Shall Overcome.' Yes we can.

"A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can.

"America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

"This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth that out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people:

"Yes we can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America."

Najib's victory speech: When can I start renovating my official residence har?

(Thanks AngryTaxpayer!)

Thorny heaven

2008-11-02T06:15:00.003-07:00

The Travel & Living channel (ch707 on Astro) is having a Bizarre Foods marathon. Not that I'm complaining because I adore food programs. But when the host Andrew Zimmern tried durian in Penang and he literally spat it out 2 seconds after he put it in his mouth, I felt really offended. Like really, REALLY offended.

For me, durian smells and tastes great. Sweet, custardy, caramel with a slightly sharp alcoholic tang in between. Heaven. I don't get how people can describe durian as tasting like burnt rotten onions, rotting cheese, or smelling like week-old socks.

I'm curious, what does durian smell or taste like to you?

Fickle

2008-10-31T01:33:00.004-07:00

I suck at this.

See right, first I ask for some expensive present (in colors and CAPS some more weii) and then when B offers to get it for me, I get this buried by this SUPER HUGE AVALANCHE OF GUILT that makes me want to beat myself up for being such a demanding person.

Cannot like this lah.

B, don't buy PSP for me. I think I don't want liao. :)

Hello weekend.

All I want for Christmas is...

2008-10-30T00:26:00.007-07:00

B, FOR CHRISTMAS I WANT A NINTENDO DS.

AND I WANT IT EITHER IN BLACK OR PINK.
BLUE ALSO CAN.
RED ALSO CAN.
ACTUALLY ANY COLOUR WOULD DO, AS LONG AS IT IS A NINTENDO DS.

Don't say I didn't tell you in advance. You can start saving up for it now.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Then again, I'll probably change my mind in about an hour's time.

How very twisted I am

2008-10-26T19:55:00.007-07:00

It's your wedding night. After the prerequisite conjugal activities with your husband, he rolls over to sleep, spent and satiated.

You, on the other hand, have another job to do. Your heart pounds like a triphammer as you put on some clothes and sneak out of the bedroom.

You proceed to tiptoe quietly to the first guest room down the corridor. Someone is waiting in there.

Naked.

Your favourite ex. The one who treated you the best, perhaps even better than the man you're currently married to, but for some reason the relationship didn't work out. Oh well, c'est la vie, there's always tonight.

You make him cum in you.

When all is said and done, you hasten him out the backdoor, giving him one final bite on the lower lip. It hurts but it's good pain. Happy pain.

Whipping out your cellphone, you hurriedly type "Im ready. Meet me 8 d door" and send it to this number, a number that you've stored in your phone for 10 over years, but never dared to dial or text. But it's all coming to an end tonight.

He's waiting at the front door, looking as good as he did when you first laid eyes on him ten years ago. Where did you first meet him? Don't remember, don't care. It's not puppylove, or whatever love that creates stars and sparkles in the sky. It's pure, unadulterated lust and you know damn well that you're going to get more than you wish for tonight with the guy you've always wanted to fuck.

Again, you make him cum in you.

3 different men in one night. 3 different sets of DNA. Whose is it?

The wait begins.

Warning: This is a work of FICTION. Couples (single or married) please DO NOT try this at home. I shall not be held responsible for any breakups or divorces that result after partaking in this twisted slice of fanstasy.

And the worms... they eat you up from inside

2008-10-23T18:47:00.005-07:00

Thanks to friends who introduced me to the joys of watching videos like this and this, I'm slightly obsessed with the amount of wormy parasites residing inside my body...

...which ultimately led to the purchase Zoben last night at Guardian Pharmacy.

Why Zoben and not Zentel?

Zoben (Pharmaniaga) is made in Selangor, Malaysia and cost RM4.10 for 2 tablets.

Zentel (GlaxoSmithKline) is made in Tianjin, China and cost RM7.10/RM7.30 for 2 tablets.

Both contain 200mg Albendazole per tablet.

Sorry GSK, but I just don't trust China-made products at the mo.

Anyway, I got home and downed two tablets with water. Then I started the long wait. From what I've garnered online, it's advisable to undergo deworming once every year, but some fanatics do it once every six months. Me? I've never been dewormed before. Obviously concerns about worms ain't high on my parents' list.

You know the most torturous part about deworming? It's the waiting. I went through the intructions in the Zoben pack countless times and all they described was what Albendazole did to the worms. Very technical and boring stuff. But they didn't mention what to expect when you drop some timber the next morning.

Every time I went to the toilet to pee, I imagined a half-poisoned worm dangling halfway out from my arsehole, squirming furiously and gasping. Every time I felt the slightest need to do a number two, I would ask myself, "Do you really want to go? Do you REALLY want to see what comes out?" Every time I felt a slight tingle on my butt, I think of pinworms going into a mass egg-laying frenzy.

When I woke up this morning, I downed 1.2 litres of water to induce faster bowel movements. After I walked and fed the dog, my lower abdomen cramped slightly. I downed an extra cup of water for good measure and headed to the loo.

*NOTE: If you're queasy, please stop reading. If you're queasy but curious, consider yourself warned!*

Ok, now I was in the loo and my tummy was cramping up good and without hesitating, I forced everything out down south. Fast and furious, like a tsunami. NO WAY was I letting any worms cling and crawl back in. Everything had to come out. NOW.

I dared myself to look into the toilet bowl.

Hmm.

There was just... shit. No worms. And no, I was nowhere near morbid enough to do a home fecal test with a stick.

I was disappointed. I was expecting to be grossed out so bad and all I got was shit. Literally.

I think I'll try again tonight.

We're not hamster owners. We're hamster parents.

2008-10-22T23:22:00.008-07:00

[12:29 am] B: Baby, you playing with Bella?
[12:31 am] Me: No. Washing her potty and cage because she cincai pee again.
[12:32 am] B: Oh dear.
[12:36 am] Me: Yeah.
[12:37 am] B: Ok, you carry on first.
[12:37 am] Me: Just finished.
[12:38 am] B: You take a rest first.
[12:38 am] Me: She's lucky she's extremely cute.
[12:40 am] B: Yes I agree.
[12:42 am] Me: Or else hamsters would've been extinct a long long time ago. I have not exactly discovered the true purpose of hamsters. Apart from being cute, they aren't exactly useful.
[12:43 am] B: Better not let Bella hear that.

[12:50 am] Me: You want to scold her for being naughty?
[12:51 am] B: Just give her stern warning would do.
[12:52 am] Me: Ok, you warn her.
[12:52 am] B: Ok, warned her already.
[12:53 am] Me: What did you tell her?
[12:53 am] B: It's our secret.
[12:54 am] Me: :(
[12:55 am] B: Don't worry, I also said nice things about you :)

Because I REALLY have nothing better to do

2008-10-15T23:59:00.003-07:00

Le list

Mood: Calmly irritated or irritatingly calm.

Outfit: Office togs. Striped buttoned-down shirt, black skirt, bra and panties.

Shoes: Black heels.

Lips: Dry.

Best thing about last weekend: Uhm. I bought eight cups of yogurt for the dog. Two of them are grape-flavored. He'd better like them or else I'm gonna be real pissed.

Nails: Finally cut them or else boyfriend wouldn't play with me.

Hair product I’m loving: My Origins Clear Head® Mint Conditioning Rinse. It's like soaking your scalp in a tub of ice.

Book I’m reading: J.G. Ballard's The Kindness of Women *insert benevolent look here*

Body Lotion: Bath & Body Works Midnight Pomegranate. Damn potent stuff. The whole office smells of it now. Someone reported to me that even the boss lifted his head for a second to sniff the air.

Goals for the week: At least 3 during futsal this coming Saturday.

(Ripped from here)

Would it be blatantly shameless of me to admit that I love my own sense of humor?

Now you know why

2008-10-11T04:40:00.003-07:00

Attended Irene's grandmother's funeral just now.

We sneaked out for a smoke and I asked her how many surviving grandparents she have left.

"Two," she told me, "My dad has been asking me to visit my grandparents on his side more often. Especially my grandpa, coz he's getting very old."

I've only got my maternal grandmother left.

Ironically, reading Irene's post regarding her grandmother, I was reminded about how my grandmother taught me how to make tong yuen - pink and white flour balls. Yes, with peanut fillings too. I think it's a Cantonese thing.

My grandmother also taught me how to play mahjong. I was 11 or 12 at that time. During school hols when I wasn't sent to Sibu, my parents would send my sis and I to grandmother's house. One day, she was so bored and itching to play mahjong, but there wasn't anyone to play with her. Desperate, she eventually and reluctantly taught me how to play. But before that she made me PROMISE over and over again that I WAS NOT TO PLAY MAHJONG WITH ANYONE ELSE. Can only play with her with her. Nobody else. And MAHJONG IS A FORM OF GAMBLING AND GAMBLING IS VERY BAD FOR CHILDREN. Very bad. That's why cannot play with other people. She repeated it throughout the game even though we only played with the small red chips and there were only two of us and I hardly understood the technical mahjong terms in Cantonese apart from the "pong" and the "kong".

And when I was finally sent to Sibu during another school hols, I amazed my paternal grandmother with my ability to play mahjong. Nevermind that I was really crap at it and kept making mistakes and eventually needed my father to rescue me from sticky situations (I never knew how to form a winning combo of tiles), my paternal grandmother was inwardly delighted to have a new mahjong partner. When I didn't want to sleep early, I would casually ask her if she wanted to play mahjong and immediately she would force my grumbling aunties to set up the table and all four of us would play one round or two.

My paternal grandmother died of cancer I think in 98 or 99. Have to check my diary for the exact year. I didn't attend her funeral, I forgot why. Probably got tied down with college assignments or exams. Looking back, I wish I attended her funeral. Admittedly, I love her more than I love my paternal grandfather. Somewhere in memory I remember her asking me fondly, "You still remember how to play mahjong? Come back to Sibu more often ok? Then you can play mahjong with Ma-ma."

I still hate Sibu but I love mahjong. And true to my past, I still play it badly. :)

I'm blogging only because I'm down with a sorethroat and flu

2008-10-08T20:49:00.006-07:00

Le Agnes B tote.

Bobby knows damn well that he isn't allowed into the house, but that doesn't stop him from pushing his luck, or me (and my mother) inviting him in just for fun.

Once, he got into the kitchen and flopped down in the most dramatic manner of, well, a dead dog. Accompanied with floppy limbs and side-hanging tongue. I tried dragging him out, but he just wouldn't budge. Finally my father chased him out with the cane.

But on days when he's just had his bath, he's sort of allowed into the house. Sort of.

Handbag Planet

2008-10-04T01:01:00.002-07:00

Register and win yourself a free handbag at www.handbagplanet.com

According to the website, upon launching on the 15th of October, the kind folks of Handbag Planet will be giving away ONE free handbag every hour for 24 hours. And mind you, all 24 bags are different. So give it a shot and win a free bag.

I'm loving bag #10, #20 and #21 :)

Btw, Miss Thongs bought me a Agnes B. Voyage tote for my birthday. Thank you womansie, me love your boobies long time! But then hor, I'm expecting nothing less than a Bottega from you next year, ok? *muka tebal grin!*

I love my country

2008-09-23T21:14:00.003-07:00

Unfortunately I can't say I feel the same for the current government.

I have said this before, and I will say this again: Freedom of speech is a myth.

However, I admire those who dare to speak their minds and expose chunks of corruption and wrongdoings of those scums running the country.

Raja Petra Kamaruddin is the people's hero. He doesn't wear a cape or a mask or swing from building to building using silken spider webs. His weapons are his words and the Malaysia Today website. He is just an ordinary person (save the little link to Selangor royalty) living in an ordinary house with an ordinary family and guess what, the Malaysian government is afraid of him.

No, actually they're scared shitless of him.

Which is why RPK was detained under the Internal Security Act (ISA) and today the screaming headlines of major newspapers in country confirmed that RPK has been detained under the ISA at the Kamunting Detention Camp, Taiping, for two years. And the person who signed the detention order on RPK is none other than Home Minister Datuk Seri Syed Hamid Albar.

A hero is unlawfully detained for speaking the truth and no amount of candlelight vigils will free him.

So now, dear readers, I have a favour to ask from you.

Would you please sign THIS online petition?

According to Haris Ibrahim, RPK asked millions of his Malaysia Today readers for 150,000 signatures for the petition to the Agong for his release from ISA detention. The current number of signatures stand at 24,+++ as of 24th Sept and I think we can do alot better than that.

So please sign the petition. All you need is to state is your name and email address. No IC, no telephone number, no home address.

Please do it.

For yourself.

For a brave man.

For an innocent hero.

For the truth.

For your country.

Suppose that...

2008-09-22T06:33:00.003-07:00

...you have a friend. Gender does not matter, but let's make the friend male. Easier to type he than he/she all the way.

Now you have this male friend, Emeril (yes, like the irritating celeb chef) whom you've made an appointment with to do something together. Could be a movie, could be a dinner... whatever.

Then on day of the appointment, no, make it roughly 45 minutes before you're suppose to meet him for whatever it is, and you're slaving away preparing dinner for your family so they won't starve while you're out, Emeril sends you this sms asking if the whatever can be postponed.

Now, first thing you think is maybe he's got a family emergency. Or some work-related crisis. Or something happened to his car. Still, you sms him back to ask why.

Then the reply comes: Because I am pissed drunk at the moment.

Now my dear readers, tell me how would you feel?

Something wicked this way comes

2008-09-15T19:01:00.005-07:00

Quoted from Reuters:

Anwar says he wants to root out corruption and end a system of affirmative action for ethnic Malays, over half of the population in this nation of 27 million people.

He says the system has not only failed the people it was aimed at helping but has also created a class of crony businessmen entirely dependent on government contracts, which has hurt the country's economic prospects.

Abdullah had agreed to hand over as prime minister to his deputy, Najib Razak, in 2010. The two met on Monday and the prime minister said that plan remained intact.

"The 2010 timeframe stays because that is the date we have officially decided on," he said, according Bernama.

However, speculation has grown that the United Malays National Organisation (UMNO), the main party in the 14-party ruling coalition, will accelerate the handover, perhaps as early as a meeting of its ruling council on Sept. 17.

"I think they smell blood, even more blood than before," said Ooi Kee Beng, a political analyst at Singapore's Institute of Southeast Asian studies.

"Barisan looks more than ever like it has no idea what it's going to do to save itself. It doesn't seem to have a gameplan."

These days, living in Malaysia is like being in an uncoordinated play where all the actors are given different, unrelated scripts and ordered to act out the play coherently. Fat chance.

Problem is, the play is not even cute or funny anymore. It's downright embarassing. The amount of stupidity coming out of the mouths of random ministers is totally cringeworthy. I wouldn't even want to waste my time elaborating. Just google under news section for "Ahmad Ismail", "Syed Hamid Albar", "RPK", and "Anwar Ibrahim".

Nowadays it seems that you can get detained under the ISA for just about anything AS LONG AS YOU ARE NOT AN UMNO MEMBER. If you're an UMNO member and you make racist or seditious statements, the government would just apologize on your behalf and if you're still unrepentant, they'll suspend and strip you off your party post for a couple of years la-di-da har har. So my advice to Malaysians who love insulting other races? Before you shoot your mouth off, join UMNO (or any BN component parties) as insurance. That way you can say whatever you like and get away with it with no more than a light slap on the wrist.

And I heard (mind you, heard only ok) that you can even get away with *koff*murder*koff*. Especially those involving C-4 explosives and a certain Mongolian lady. Have to type this like this because as you know, I'm Chinese and not a member of any party and also I'm a blogger and the Government Hates Bloggers.

Unfortunately if you want to join the party now, it might be a little too late because it's September 16 and if all goes well, PM Abdullah and his little gang are going to be ousted by the once-ousted Deputy PM Anwar Ibrahim.

Anwar says he'll release the crossover list today.

I can't wait!

Irene calls him Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde

2008-09-06T02:25:00.003-07:00

I just discovered today that my dog is an anti-social mofo.

He's not outrightly aggressive towards strangers. He's just indifferent. He wouldn't go near them. He's not even curious enough to want to sniff strangers out at first sight.

Then when strangers go too near and try to befriend him, he bares his fangs and snarls like a demon.

I thought of boarding him with my colleague when I go to Melbourne. My colleague has a female German Shepherd the size of a Shetland pony. Very noisy and intimidating. Once I stared the dog in the eye from outside the cage, she snarled at me and barked furiously till my arm was splattered with doggy saliva.

My colleague is worried that her dog will eat my dog. I'm more worried that my dog will eat her.

WANNA GO TO MELBOURNE?

2008-09-01T06:51:00.002-07:00

I have for sell the following AirAsia tickets:

Kuching - KL
Departing 30 Nov 08 (Sun) 0920 hrs

KL - Kuching
Departing 14 Dec 08 (Sun) 1145 hrs

Total: RM 385 (including surcharges, fees & tax + checked baggage + insurance)

KL - Melbourne
Departing 1 Dec 08 (Mon) 1425 hrs

Melbourne - KL
Departing 14 Dec 08 (Sun) 0145 hrs

Total: RM1,711 (including surcharges, fees & tax + meals + checked baggage + insurance)

I will bear the costs of the name transfer. If interested, leave a message in my comment box.

Isn't V for Vendetta such an appropriate Merdeka eve movie?

2008-08-30T00:13:00.006-07:00

My bookshelf. Spot the Harry Potters and the Dan Browns. Actually there are more books but they've taken up temporary residence in my bedroom.

I'm currently watching V for Vendetta (again) on Cinemax. God help that our government will never become like Norsefire. This movie is one of the most migraine-inducing, intellectual movies I've watched, but somehow I feel compelled to watch it to fuel my paranoia about living under a fascist government.

I'm currently reading Stephen King's Duma Key. It's been very long since I last read Mr King's works. I haven't hit the scary bits yet, but I can't wait!

Happy Merdeka y'alls. :)

A good book is better than sex

2008-08-24T22:56:00.003-07:00

Che-Cheh tagged me with this bookworm Q&A, so here goes.

P/S: If books bore you, then you can skip this post.

1. Do you remember how you developed a love for reading?

Since I was young, I had tons of books. Even my parents didn't have that many books. My books took up an entire 4-tiered shelf. Ironically, I preferred to read on my own. My parents did attempt the nightly read-to-your-child-during-bedtime, but I didn't enjoy it much. Too boring. And they read too slow.

2. What are some books you read as a child?

Books by Ladybird and Enid Blyton were firm favourites. I did indulged in Nancy Drew (Hardy Boys were boring) and works by Judy Blume. The first adult novel I read was A Stone for Danny Fisher by Harold Robbins. I was 9 or 10 at that time. However, my earliest "education" came in the form of Harold Robbin's Goodbye, Janette. Sex, cat o' nine tails, S&M, incest, girl-on-girl, man-on-man... pretty heady stuff for an 11 yo.

If anyone thinks I am making this up, my colleague can vouch for this. We were primary school classmates. I almost had my Goodbye, Janette confiscated by the teacher.

3. What is your favourite genre?

As a result of over-indulging in adult romance novels at a very young age, I'm now inclined toward children's fantasy. Which is why I happily splurge on Harry Potter, Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials Trilogy (which include The Golden Compass), and The Spiderwick Chronicles.

If anyone is willing to sell/gift me the entire Tim and the Hidden People series by British author Sheila K McCullagh, I will be eternally grateful. I used to be a fan of this 80's children's book series back in primary school. Short of robbing my old school library, I have no idea how to get my hands on these books.

4. Do you have a favourite novel?

I have three, and all three are by my favourite chef Anthony Bourdain. I read and reread Kitchen Confidential, A Cook's Tour, and The Nasty Bits.

5. Where do you usually read?

Anywhere and everywhere. Unfortunately, some people find my reading habit offensive. Once, I was having lunch at a kopitiam with my parents. After eating, I took out my book while my parents chatted with the kopitiam owner. Suddenly he reached over, took my book from me and closed it while saying, "You shouldn't read so much!"

I didn't know whether to be tickled or appalled.

6. Do you usually have more than one book you are reading at a time?

Sometimes. I'm fine with multi-reading.

7. Do you read nonfiction in a different way or place than you read fiction?

Nope. It's all the same to me, although I hardly read nonfiction.

8. Do you buy most of the books you read, or borrow them, or check them out of the library?

Now that I am working, I prefer to buy books. That said, I adore going to the library to borrow books, but I hardly have the time to do so. Sometimes I lend my books to my friends and they lean theirs to me.

9. Do you keep most of the books you buy? If not, what do you do with them?

Of course I keep my books! I only sell my old textbooks. But most of my childhood books have been given away to charity. I'm all for cultivating the reading habit. I think children nowadays should be reading more instead of rotting their brains out in front of the television or the PC.

I'm not as mean as Che-Cheh to not lend out my favourite books. On contrary, if I enjoy a particular book, I'm more than willing to lend it out. Unless of course, the borrower has a history of destroying my books.

10. If you have children, what are some of the favorite books you have shared with them? Were they some of the same ones you read as a child?

My children are going to be avid readers. I wouldn't have it any other way. And I'll probably start them on a diet of Enid Blyton classics, but as long they're into reading, I'll probably let them have a free rein in choosing their own books.

11. What are you reading now?

I am rereading Neil Gaiman's Mirrormask: The Illustrated Film Script of the Motion Picture from the Jim Henson Company.

12. Do you keep a TBR (to be read) list?

Nope. If I did, it'll be far too long.

13. What books would you like to reread?

Sheila K McCullagh's Tim and the Hidden People series and Puddle Lane series, Judy's Blume's older works, and Beverly Cleary's Ramona series.

I miss Ramona Quimby :)

14. Who are your favourite authors?

Neil Gaiman and Anthony Bourdain.

One day I shall take a picture of my book cabinet and post it up. Haha.

The 10 minute post

2008-08-22T04:47:00.002-07:00

I bought myself the Panasonic Lumix DMC-FX36. Super sleek and sexy (like you lah Slenz), Leica lens, 10MP of camwhoring potential, plus some intelligence mode that automatically switches to macro or night-mode or portrait depending on the situation. Actually I'm kinda questioning my purchase, since I don't take pictures much or camwhore. I guess the thrill is in the OWNING. Haha.

Sent Bobby to vet this morning because his breathing was awfully loud and heavy. Guess what, the vet has no idea what's wrong with him, so he ordered a full blood test (RM85). The damn dog was, to put it nicely, highly uncooperative, which resulted in him needing to be sedated (RM28), and antibiotics (RM15) JUST IN CASE it's an infection. And the vet, being the diplomatic soul that he is, actually said, "You know, the level of aggression in your dog is... not a very good thing." Yes doctor, I fully agree with you. Let's put him to sleep.

The vet also commented that Bobby is probably the strongest dog that he's seen so far. 15 minutes after being sedated, he could still muster the energy the bare his fangs at the vet and snarl. It was pretty horrifying.

Oh, and my evil pooch is terrified of the Persian cats at the vet. He wouldn't even look at them.

Literally

2008-08-16T01:29:00.004-07:00

Article from The Straits Times (Wednesday, 27 September 2006):

"DIRECT SELLERS' GROUP AIMS TO SHED STIGMA OF PYRAMID SELLING"

(Yes, I know it's lame, and so are you)

If the Joker had a pet...

2008-08-10T08:26:00.009-07:00

This is Bobby, the dog with a great sense of humour.

Bobby loves jokes.

Tell him a funny joke.

Tell him an even funnier joke.

This is what happens when you tell him a bad joke.

Sorry dude.

The continuing saga of Bobby

2008-08-07T00:14:00.003-07:00

Bobby is the most incorrigible dog I've ever met. For the two weeks we've had him, he:

1. Bit through the fence to escape back to his old house. TWICE. The second time round, my father had to enlarge the hole in the fence for him to come back.

2. Chewed up my favourite slippers. Mind you, they weren't cheap. He also chewed up my sister's old sandals. Instead of punishing him, we've taken to keeping all footwear indoors.

3. Ripped the morning papers to pieces yesterday and this morning. I yelled at him and whacked his butt hard yesterday, but obviously it didn't fazed him one bit. He'll run away when he sees me coming with a rolled up newspaper, but he has never screamed once after a beating. He just flattens his ears and closes his eyes until the beating is over. This morning he got whacked twice by my father and I.

4. Bit my father and my sister. He's slightly psychotic, and to top it off, he's got severe food aggression problems. If he was in some Western country, he'll probably be shot or put to sleep by now.

5. Got fixed. Thank goodness he doesn't hump, but he was a scent-marking fiend. After neutering him, I noticed that he's been marking less and he isn't so interested in the flirtatious female strays hanging outside my house. He is also barking less. For some reason, the timbre of his bark has changed. Before this, he used to have a deep macho WOOF WOOF bark, but now it's more of the ARF ARF quality. Hmm.

6. Weighs 17 kg, which puts him in the medium-sized, bordering large category. Very important, because I can still control him while out on walks. He's slightly better on the leash now and can be trusted to walk by my side nicely unless there's something more interesting (tree, grass, garbage, sand, soil, flowers, bushes, leaves etc) to investigate. Come to think of it, 99% of stuff he sees during walks is worth tugging on the leash and getting choked for.

I was considering getting a harness for him at first, but right now I'm thinking of changing his padded collar for a choker chain. If his weight breaches the 20kg mark, I'll buy one.

7. Is pretty good at holding his crap in. So far he has not poo'd or deliberately pee'd (not counting scent marking) within the house compound. Actually this was our main concern before we got him, but ironically it's the LEAST of our problems right now.

Will post a picture of him soon. Everyone says he looks like a white fox/huskie.

Cryptical happiness

2008-07-30T02:54:00.004-07:00

She's gorgeous.

He loves her.

All is right in the world again.

Yeah I know I'm probably the last person in the world to know about this because I'm pretentiously blur, but that doesn't make me any less happy for them. Funny when I think back about how he would go on and on and on about Japanese girls and he finally hooked one. Heh.

Wok the dog

2008-07-25T23:47:00.002-07:00

Did you know that eggplants/brinjals/aubergines are members of the potato family?

I had no idea.

I'm beginning to resent Bobby. He's not very nice. It's not quite his fault but argh, somebody's got to be the scapegoat, right?

Yesterday I got it into my head that I was going to walk Bobby. Problem is, he has never worn a collar, seen a leash, or experienced life beyond the perimeters of the house compound.

It was a nightmare.

First he tried to chew the collar and leash. My father had to hold him down while I snapped on the collar and attached the leash. Then he wouldn't step out of the gate until my father carried him out. When he got out, he went nuts. Seriously. Like he was on speed or something. He wanted to go right, left, forward and backward all at one go. He lifted his leg to scent mark every five seconds (talk about being dominant). Everything HAD to be marked. He didn't care that his neighbour was watching while he lifted his leg on her flower pots. He didn't care that if it was just a mossy lump of brick. If we could read his thoughts it would probably be along the lines of MARKMARKMARKMARKMARK...

Bobby was sooooooooooooooooooooo bad at walking on a leash. It was like trying to walk an extremely drunk savant. He swerved right, did an abrupt turn and went extreme left, curling the leash around my foot in the process. Suddenly, he tugged hard on the leash and shook his head furiously.

The collar undid itself.

Immediately he shot off down the road. It didn't help that almost every house in the neighbourhood owned dogs. Bobby's antics set off a choir of barks and growls up and down the road. It was so freakin embarassing. I didn't dare to run after him because he might panic and bolt. But every second he isn't captured increases the risk of him being knocked down by the occasional passing car.

Luckily he found a particular bush (outside a house with two big dogs that were barking their heads off at him) which was, for reasons unknown, highly enticing to his doggy nose. I managed to sneak up on him and grab his forelegs until my father caught up and helped me to reattach the collar.

If it wasn't enough, Bobby refused to turn around to go home. He stood cemented in the middle of the road watching a pair of small dogs yap furiously at him from their cages. My father had to cajole him soothingly to go home because it was drizzling. And after carrying him through the gate (this time he didn't want to get in), he kept sniffing and rooting around the side gate in hope that it'll magically reopen.

Btw, I just realized that the opening line of this post has absolutely no connection to the rest of the story. But since Chef Wan says that eggplants belong to the potato family, I guess it must be true.

My little white hellhound

2008-07-19T01:20:00.003-07:00

Bobby is bad bad bad dog.

He's got his little quirky moods. Most of the time he's really nice and he'll brush his head against your hands for attention, like a cat. Other times, he's Cerberus incarnate.

He does his hellhound impression mostly to my sister. Usually it starts with a snarl, upper lips curl ed to reveal his impressive fangs. Then he'll bark (more like a roar) and lunge at the fence. By then my sister would have fled for her life swearing that she'll never feed the damn dog ever again. But my parents are sadistically adamant that she build a rapport with Bobby hahahahahahaha.

Anyway, yesterday after work I went to the back of the house to feed Bobby. Usually I make him do a standard set of tricks (up, down and kiss) before I give him his treat. Then I petted him.

Suddenly he roared and lunged at my hand. I felt his teeth against my skin but he didn't clamp down. Still it was terrifying. My father always say that the dog's just playing, because if he really intended to bite us, we would've lost our limbs a long time ago. Still I don't think it's quite right for a dog to behave like this... :-/

How arh? I don't think there's such thing as dog obedience classes in Kuching. And I have no idea how to socialize him without risking the safety of other dogs/people.

To Miss Koh MK in London

2008-07-12T00:32:00.003-07:00

Dear Miss Koh,

I'm still waiting for my Dorothy Perkins clutch. But since it's probably NEVER going to arrive, let me give you an update on the religious situation in family.

My mother has taken to reading the bible EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. In between, she reads some spiritual literature. Kind of like Chicken Soup for the Soul, but it's written for women to aid them in their search for the Big Guy Above.

My father has taken to reading the spiritual literature too. My house is littered with Christian books at the moment. Even literature pertaining to sex has a spiritual slant to it. I call it God-approved Karma Sutra.

My parents say grace before every meal.

They attend bible studies every Friday night.

Strangely they don't go to church.

The religious shift is taking a toll on me. Especially when my mother "suggested" that I read more God books. I have taken to confining myself in the bedroom when they're at home.

I don't think I'll be surprised if one day my sister tells me that my mother has been preaching to the hamster while I'm at work. Not that it's a bad thing though, Bella can be as cranky as ten devils if she doesn't get enough sleep.

Speaking of pets, here's a picture of pug for sale in Perak. RM1,250 with MKA cert, dun pray pray arh.

I know you're missing Deedee now. And you're probably close to tears. Don't worry, I don't think she misses you at all.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

What goes around...

2008-07-11T03:58:00.003-07:00

regex.info by Jeffrey Friedl is one of my favourite photoblogs because of the stunning quality of photos taken. Heck, even my desktop wallpaper - a stunning beach shot - was taken from Jeffrey's blog.

However, I felt rather annoyed when he made the following comment on this post:

"I tried a longer-exposure wide-angle shot to capture more of what it felt like to be there, but sadly, it doesn't pick up the deep dark blue that still existed in the sky, the cigarette smoke from the jerk who decided to stand next to me with his cancer stick, or the misquotes..."

Well Mr Friedl, the jerk had every right to be there as you had. Until smoking becomes permanently outlawed, I don't think smokers should be labeled negatively. If you want to be judgmental, blame the government first for allowing the sales of cancer sticks.

I bet somewhere in cyberspace, the jerk is probably lamenting on his blog about the white devil who was hogging more than his fair share of personal space with his huge ass camera.

Karma's an unforgiving bitch who'll bite you back in the ass one day.

Mr Friedl, wouldn't it be ironic if your sweet little boy grows up to be a cigarette-toting miscreant?

My adventure of driving to work in the morning

2008-07-10T19:04:00.002-07:00

(Yes, I shamelessly ripped Mr 9's style of title-ing my post today. De Neville brothers ay wankers, la)

Anyhoo, I drive myself to work every morning because my salary doesn't allow me (yet) to buy a BMW 7-series complete with a chauffeur in tuxedo. But it's okay because if I manage to leave the house at the right time, which is usually between 8:32 to 8:42, chances of me meeting The Guy who Drives the Red Toyota Vios is significantly higher and that's makes me a very happy girl.

I have no idea who he is but he's hot. Hot as in the YA I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABIES kinda hot. And he smokes every morning in his car while driving. A few days back, I was parked behind his car at the traffic lights and he oh-so-casually dropped his cigarette butt onto the road and it took me quite a fair bit of willpower not to hop down to pick up the ciggie and send it for DNA testing.

I think I've been watching too much CSI.

Anyhoo, this poses a problem because:

1. Extremely hot guys are usually gay.

2. Guys who drive the Vios are usually metrosexuals. Now, metros are just one step away from gays. This guy drives a RED Vios. What am I suppose to think?

3. Now the smoking part is abit disturbing and it fucks up the entire metro equation. You see, metros are usually well-groomed and have ridiculously lofty hygiene standards. This guy is extremely well-groomed (from what I can see through my rear view mirror) but metros do not smoke while driving. God forbid if a single speck of ash lands on their clothes or their car upholstery.

4. I think he's single because no girl would wanna sit in a car that smells like an ashtray.

5. I think he's gay because no girl would wanna sit in a car that smells like an ashtray. So it's got to be a guy.

Blehhhh.

Vampires are out. Zombies are in.

2008-07-06T01:05:00.003-07:00

Yesterday I gave up a whole day of OT to stay at home and actually enjoy a real Saturday.

As a result of spending 10 hours in the office from Monday to Friday for a few weeks + 8 hours on Saturday, I've stopped trying to figure out what day of the week it is, because it's all the same. I don't remember what the sunset looks like anymore. Worst of all, I've taken to dreaming about the office and work.

It would be extremely hilarious if it happened to some other people, but it's so not funny when it happens to yourself.

So yes, I took time off yesterday.

Last night I didn't dream of the office.

And today I feel less like a overly paranoid zombie and more like a normal human being again.

iFood

2008-06-30T03:31:00.002-07:00

Even though there are food that I certainly would not eat (again), I don't actually consider myself a picky eater.

For me, there's food, and there's FOOD!!! The latter makes your eyes sparkle, your tummy rumble and your saliva glands go into hyperdrive. So what falls into the FOOD!!! category:

1. Fresh sashimi.

While I'll eat sushi, I get ecstatic when I'm faced with screamingly fresh sashimi. I love my sashimi. Salmon, tuna, swordfish, mackerel, octopus, ark shell... bring them on! I also love "local" sashimi or umai. Basically, it's slices of raw fish/prawns marinated with lime juice and fresh cut chili. And I only like my umai raw. Once the seafood has been thoroughly "cooked" by the acidic juices of the lime, I don't want it.

2. Pizza with truffle oil.

Late one night at Seattle, Miss Thongs and I ordered some pizza with truffle oil from Ristorante Beccari. When I saw the word "truffle", I was immediately possessed by my inner food snob and I knew there and then that I just HAD to order it. I don't quite remember how much it cost (less than RM50, more than RM20) but just for some magical truffle (and it's just the oil we're talking about here) it's worth the illusion of luxury. LOL.

3. Sago worms.
I love sago worms,
They don't wriggle in my tummy,
Fried with kicap and chili,
They're so very yummy.

Ok, next please.

4. Kasam babi

I tried kasam babi for the very first time on Saturday night. It's basically raw wild boar meat preserved with salt and rice and left to ferment in a jar for six months or more (the Bidayuh version). From what I heard, it's a highly acquired taste, but I loved it from the first whiff. It smells slightly durian-y, and the taste... oh gawd... it's like a perfect harmony of salty and sour and at that moment, you've never felt prouder of yourself. What are the odds of a contestant on Fear Factor having to drink a vile concoction of rotting squid and worm juice, and actually loving it? It's the same feeling when eating kasam babi, except that it's a zillion times better than whatever they're serving on Fear Factor.

Of dogs, hamsters and tearjerkers

2008-06-30T02:22:00.002-07:00

Guess what, I don't want a Moleskine anymore. Yes, I'm an incorrigible fickle-minded female. (Sorry Jass, I hope you haven't made the hike to Kino yet)

Anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, guess what again? Remember Bobby, the dog my parents never had? He's moving in with us next week! His owner wanted to hand him over to us tonight, but unfortunately we haven't made any preparations yet, so it will have to be next week. In the meantime, my father is getting his friend to install a shelter and a baby gate at the back of the house, so Bobby will have a deluxe L-shaped concrete run.

I told Bella that when Bobby arrives, she'll no longer be the Most Beloved Pet in the house.

Me: Poor Bella, you'll be relegated to second-class member of the family next week.
Bella: ???
Mother: No lah, she wouldn't.
Me: *whispers to Bella* Don't you believe a word she say, she's obviously lying.
Bella: ???

I'm currently reading P.S. I Love You. I loved the movie. It's so freaking sad.

Me: Ma, the husband is so sweet horh? After he died he still managed to send the wife to Ireland for holiday.
Mother: Yalorh.
Me: If it was Daddy, where do you think he'll send you?
Mother: ....
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HE'LL SEND YOU TO SIBU!!!!!!
Mother: -________-

Happiness is a myth

2008-06-24T23:31:00.003-07:00

Right now all I can think of is that I want a Moleskine sketchbook. Will somebody PLEASE run to Kinokuniya and get me either a Moleskine watercolor notebook or a Moleskine sketchbook? They're priced at RM55.46 each.

Yes, I'll bear the cost of the sketchbook, plus postage. I could order direct from Kino, but their postage charge to East M'sia is bloody ridiculous.

I don't know how I've convinced myself that I'll die without a Moleskine.

Can you tell that I'm so fucking unhappy at the moment?

And I would appreciate it very much if nobody send me comments to cheer me up, because it'll only make me feel like a total bitch. You're only allowed to comment if:

You're willing to help me get my Moleskine.
You're willing to GIFT me a Moleskine.
You're not commenting about me at all. Feel free to rant about the govt, price hikes, your pets etc, but NOTHING work-related please.

Thankyouverymuch.

I'm still here

2008-06-19T06:17:00.003-07:00

Been doing OT till 7-8pm on weekdays, hence the lack of blog updates, dates, yumchar sessions etc. And this will go on for 2 months or more and by the time this ends, I'll forget what it used to be when I had a life.

1. I'm beginning to hate high heels. Okay, I hate high heels. Especially when I'm walking alone back to my car at night. And no, my car is not parked in the basement of my office building. Instead it's located across the busy main road and I have to walk pass a small dark jungle-y section to reach the carpark. And every time I have to walk alone at night, I get visions of being robbed and when I make a police report, the police will be sniggering at me for being stupid enough to wear high heels.

2. I don't drink alcohol because I've got zero alcohol tolerance. There, I've said it. But I've never tasted any form of alcohol which I liked enough to attempt to build up my tolerance. Beer is bitter. Wine is sour (except for sweet white). Tequila reminds me of lab alcohol. And everything else in between tastes like cough syrup to me.

3. I started smoking because I wanted to prove to myself that nicotine is not addictive. 6 years later and I'm still not contented with the results.

4. Sex is most fun when you're single and available. If you're not, then it's overrated.

5. Hamsters rank higher than dogs on the cuteness scoreboard. I've seen ugly dogs but I've never seen ugly hamsters. It helps that all hamsters look alike too.

6. I wish that Aaron will go back to Australia faster because he's such a clingy little bitch and he doesn't understand that people have to work everyday and doesn't have the energy to go out every night. And he's like the world's most horrible doctor. But I know that when he goes back I'll miss him heaps.

I fell sick two days ago and slept the day away. It was probably the closest I came to pampering myself.

Now what about a 40% increase in my salary?

2008-06-04T23:25:00.003-07:00

I'm seriously trying to be stoic over the recent hike in fuel prices. Hell, I didn't even join the mad rush to top up my fuel tank last night. Pointless, considering I've got slightly over 3/4 tank of petrol left from two days ago.

I hate the govt. I'm not going to pretend that I don't.

How can you trust the govt when they LIE to us over and over again. Just before the elections, they promised that they're not not going to hike the fuel prices. After the elections (May 24), they said they're not going to hike the fuel prices. Then on June 2, Shahrir reported that fuel prices may rise beginning August.

And they raised it today.

Remember before the elections (Feb 12), Badawi announced that he wasn't going to dissolve the parliament the next day. Come Feb 13, he dissolved the parliament.

I am so disgusted. If my hamster could speak, she'll probably express her disgust as well. Oh well, perhaps later I shall line her potty with newspaper pictures of Badawi and his henchmen.

Last night on TV3 news, there was a little table comparing the petrol and diesel prices in Malaysia and Singapore. Bloody hell, who is the government trying to cheat? We aren't even earning in the same currency, dammit.

If you're into figures and calculations, this guy did a pretty good analysis on how our petrol is "subsidised". Maths has never been my forte, but I can roughly figure out that there is no subsidy involved.

Blogging is getting boring

2008-06-03T08:08:00.002-07:00

Was tailing a dark blue Merc 500SL at the traffic lights when I suddenly wondered what it would be like to own a convertible.

A Dodge Viper to be more precise.

What wouldn't I give to drive a Viper past Soho on a weekend night and whenever I spot a chick who's taller/slimmer/sexier/hotter/whatever than me, I'll flash her the finger and scream, "UP YOURS BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCCCCHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!"

If I ever do strike 6/49, god help those bimbos.

I think one 6/49 not enough. Make it five 6/49s. LOL.

I'm not Chinese, I'm Malaysian... yerdeh.

2008-05-19T08:38:00.004-07:00

Three hours at the Carwash with my ex-lecturer is enough to satisfy my weekly demand for gossip.

I haven't met him for months (ever since he squashed all my hopes of him being gay by getting a girlfriend). Some more, he complained that I don't feature him in my blog anymore.

Cannot-lah sir, later your bitch thinks that I'm going after you then she gets jealous and goes into a homicidal rage and burn all my college records and bathe my car in acid, then how? LOL.

I got rather annoyed this afternoon while grocery shopping with my family. My mother gave me grief for buying RM1 worth of lemongrass because she thought there were still some left in the fridge. Before I could explain myself, my father added, "Always like this. You never check before you buy."

I actually stomped my foot and half-yelled, "DON'T.HAVE.ANYMORE!!!"

Bloody hell, I'm the only one in the house who uses lemongrass (sup kambing, anyone? Not.) and I sure like hell would remember if there were any left in the fridge. My mother's the amnesiac-yet-compulsive shopper in the family. She's the reason why we have to throw out frozen tomatoes on a weekly basis. She's also the reason why I am forced to incorporate tomatoes in nearly everything I cook. She's the reason why I have to cook stuff that I don't feel like cooking, because if I don't, the stuff will spoil and my father will start bitching about food going to waste.

After bitching about my poor RM1 lemongrass, we left the supermarket and my mother spotted two donation boxes - one for the victims of the China earthquake and the other for some tragedy in Myanmar (I think). My mother, being the kindhearted soul that she is, decided to put some money in the boxes (definitely more than RM1). Feeling spiteful, I asked my sister, "How many people died in China earthquake?"

"More than 30,000 I think," she replied.

"Wow, I bet the Chinese government is thrilled that nature is providing them with POPULATION CONTROL ON A LARGE SCALE. And why do people even bother donating to China? As if the government isn't rich enough. Do you know that China has the largest reserve of US dollars?"

Ems, this one's for you

2008-05-14T08:09:00.003-07:00

I seriously doubt the quality of young lawyers and soon-to-be-lawyers these days.

Maybe I do sound like I'm generalizing - lumping the good and the bad together, so I'll try to be more specific: I worry about the quality of young lawyers and soon-to-be-lawyers from this particular college right in heart of the city. Literally.

Those I have met:

Lawyer #1: Is a good friend. When it comes to "creative discussions", I can bury him under the table any day. Any subject is fair game - his mother, his sister, his dog, his salon girl, his love for snogging transvestites etc. Sure I don't fight fair, but then again I'm not a lawyer what. Haha.

Soon-to-be-lawyer #1: Old guy, maybe in his 40's or something. Married with kids. Extremely horny, and not at all discriminating. As long as you're female, you're fair game. Which actually makes the whole situation more insulting than flattering.

Soon-to-be-lawyer #2: Is a bimbo of the highest order. To be fair, I've never spoken to her before, but her reputation precedes her far and beyond. Reputable sources tell me the same thing: she's not exactly dumb, but she doesn't bother to use her brains. And she held onto the bimbo act for far too long, until it became a permanent part of her personality.

Soon-to-be-lawyer #3: Is a rich kid who doesn't have to work. I don't think he even attends classes because he's always either getting drunk or playing online PC games. I know he's not dumb because once in awhile he'll sprout random legal jargon, especially those pertaining to rape/sodomy charges.

Lawyer-has-been #1: Is another bimbo, but somewhat smarter than the aforementioned Miss Bimbo. An eternal student. Back in 1998 she was in the same college as I was, taking some American university program. Fast forward a few years later and she's doing law in the college in the heart of the city. But I don't think she completed the course. Perhaps another twenty years down the line, when my kids enter college, they'll probably have her as a classmate.

Lawyer-has-been #2: Is a dumb ex-rich kid. Academically I'm not too sure how bright he is, but if his actions can be used as an indicator of his mentality, I'd say he's as screwed up as Paris Hilton during her pussy-flashing sessions. This guy's a male bimbo who's main aim in life is to have the latest gadgets and unlimited blowjobs. Despite his pretty boy looks, he repeatedly fails in scoring pussy because he reeks of Eau de Desperation and no girl likes a desperado.

Unless he's rich and drives a nice car.

If I ever need a lawyer, I'm gonna choose one who:

Has done CLP. CLP is probably the best tool out there to weed out the undesirables.
Has never put nude/semi-nude photos of himself/herself online. Have some respect for the profession, please.
Can consistently win arguments. Actually horh, I don't care if my lawyer fights clean or dirty in court. Bottom line is he/she must win the case for me. Apart from them, I don't care how they do it.
Looks like a lawyer. Which means clean and smart-looking. No visible piercings and tattoos. No brightly coloured hair. No weird accessories (ethnic beaded necklace, plaited leather bracelet etc). Unless he can give me a 101% guarantee that he'll win the case for me, following which he can wear whatever he damn well wants.

Veggieham

2008-05-10T01:46:00.004-07:00

I think this photo's kinda fucked, but I don't have any photo editing software on my notebook except for Picasa. So I made Bella "glow". Haha.

Miss Bella has settled down a fair bit from her former hyper-snappish self and everyone's glad. Initially my mother had some misgivings because Bella wouldn't eat dried mealworms unlike PPBoy, but it seems that she's very good at eating raw vegetables.

My mother likes kids who eats their vegetables. :)

So far Bella has eaten cabbage, long beans, lettuce, kailan, xiao bai cai, rock melon, bittergourd and cucumber. Very healthy.

She still doesn't let me pick her up, but when the moon is in line with Uranus and I happen to be holding a sunflower seed, she'll consent to delicately traipse across my palm to retrieve the seed. On occasion, I'll hold her in my hands for a few seconds before releasing her. Any longer and she'll start to get edgy.

If I have one complain about Bella, it's her obsession with hygiene. She's very good at using her potty, but she'll only use it for three pee sessions. After that, she thinks it too dirty for her liking and she'll pee elsewhere. So annoying. And it's not like she doesn't have anything to line her potty to absorb the pee. I use imported Breeder Celect cat litter for her, which is alot more expensive than the clay litter PPBoy used, because initially Bella had a bad habit of eating cat litter.

As a result, I have to wash her potty and change the litter almost every night. I still cannot get over the fact that my hamster pees on recycled Australian paper pellets. I wonder if I can just line the potty with copious amounts of newspaper. After it's still paper. And alot cheaper.

In other news, my friend just sms-ed me to ask for instructions on consuming Postinor. Hmm, I thought instructions came with the box, but apparently her pills are not recently bought. I hope they still work though. I don't think her 54yo partner would appreciate being a father right now.

RPK David vs Goliath government

2008-05-06T19:33:00.006-07:00

Raja Petra Kamaruddin is my idea of a perfect man. He's highly intelligent and passionate about what he believes in. He gets bonus points for being a Malay of royal blood (he is the cousin of the Sultan of Selangor) and having a thing for Chinese women.

Unfortunately, he's 58 years old and also married to a Chinese woman.

These days, he's making headlines as the first blogger in Malaysia to be charged under the Sedition Act. According to The Star Online, Raja Petra is accused of publishing the article “Let’s send the Altantuya murderers to hell” in his website www.malaysia-today.net. The article is alleged to have contained nine paragraphs of seditious words.

IMHO, anyone who have been following Raja Petra's fiery articles should know the nature of his writings. He has never been one to sugarcoat his words. Frankly, I'm surprised that the government hasn't clamped down on him long ago. He's been slamming Badawi, Khairy, Mahathir and various MPs for as long as I can remember. Also, I remember once when he lodged a police report that UMNO had appointed 25 "cyber-troopers" to post seditious messages on his website.

In his post, Raja Petra said that when asked by a police officer how he knew about the UMNO tactic, he said he had paid informers inside the party.

"I bribe them to feed me information," he wrote.

"I just slam RM1,000 onto the table and ask them to tell me everything, and they sing like a canary. It is not that hard to buy information."

I have this feeling that Raja Petra is actually enjoying himself. His royal heritage has given him a higher level of immunity compared to commoners. Should he be charged? Well, if he had to be, I would say yes... but for libel, not sedition. However, the one thing that makes me suspicious is why was he arrested after that particular Altantuya post, and not the others? What makes the slamming of the Deputy PM and his wife more special than slamming the PM, his nephew and the other cronies?

Unless...

Unless...

Unless there's a truth in those writings.

Like someone always to say, "If you didn't do anything wrong, why should you be scared, right?"

That's one name and number less in my phonebook

2008-05-05T01:16:00.005-07:00

He didn't wish me happy birthday this year.

I am very much a creature of habit. Every year, I definitely know who I'm getting presents and birthday greetings from. Not all greeters are givers, but all givers are greeters. Since we broke up, we both switched from being givers to greeters.

He'll sms me twice a year - on CNY and on my birthday. Without fail.

This year he didn't.

At first I had this niggling feeling at the back of head. I mean, it's bad enough that we've downgraded from talking to texting, but do we have abolish that too? Does that mean that if we ever do bump into each other one day, I'm suppose to pretend I don't know you? I mean, c'mon... the two plus years... was it THAT bad? Haha. If my memory serves me correct, I know I cried oceans when it ended, but it was one of the better breakups because it didn't take me too long to get over the pain.

And then I remembered that he was no longer working in his old hometown and he's probably pursuing his ambition of finding a wanita soleha in some very Islamic state in West M'sia. One that covers herself up from head to toe, prays five times a day without fail, and doesn't give him grief by clubbing till the wee hours in the morning two days in a row.

Actually I am very happy for him. So happy, that I'm practically giggling while typing this.

I hate neopets

2008-05-04T05:35:00.003-07:00

My birthday haul this year:

A pair of Adidas slippers
RM50 DiGi reload
Arthur Spiderwick's Field Guide to the Fantastical World Around You
Mirrormask: The Illustrated Film Script
Birthday dinner (from parents)
Pre-birthday dinner (from B)
Post-birthday Japanese buffet (from him, her, him and his friend)

Ems, if you're reading this, I need more neopoints please please please. I blew everything furnishing my bloody neohome. And I still want a paintbrush... *sniff*

Nacho Libre is next on HBO.
Gosh I'm hungry.

Will blog later when I'm feeling more coherent.

BIg Apple Donuts & Coffee, you suck

2008-04-28T09:57:00.006-07:00

Last Saturday night, my family and I went to Big Apple Donuts & Coffee at The Spring to, well, try the donuts.

My sister was dispatched to stand in line which was soooo long, it resembled a double "S". Anyhoo, after waiting more than 15 mins to place her order (4 cups of tea + 4 free donuts), the bill came up to RM51.

My sister paid, then immediately sensed that the bill was on the high side, and so she asked for the receipt. The cashier told her, "Sorry, we have to keep all our customers' receipts."

My sister then asked the cashier to repeat the order. "4 cups of tea, and you get four free donuts with that, and a box of one dozen donuts," said the cashier.

"But I did not order one dozen donuts!"

"Yes you did, I saw you carrying a box just now."

Getting angrier by the second, my sister insisted that she wasn't carrying any box and even showed her bare hands to the cashier.

"Please refund me RM22. I did not order one dozen donuts."

The cashier kept insisting she saw my sister take a box of donuts and steadfastly refused to refund RM22. When she saw that my sister was really telling the truth, the stupid cashier tried to worm her way out from the situation by asking my sister to pick out one dozen donuts.

Sis exploded. "IF I HAVE TO CHOOSE ONE DOZEN DONUTS, I HAVE TO GET BACK IN LINE AND QUEUE UP FOR ANOTHER 20 MINS! I DON'T WANT YOUR DONUTS, JUST GIVE ME BACK MY MONEY!"

In the end the cashier grudgingly gave her back RM22.

What a bitch.

The cashier was lucky that it wasn't me she was dealing with. My sister is relatively non-confrontational unless badly provoked. I wold have raised holy hell and demanded to see the supervisor. See if I don't come away with a box of free donuts. Haha.

Big Apple donuts are nothing to shout about anyway. Honestly, they taste similar to whatever Taka or Fujisan bakery is offering, except they've got fancy schmancy toppings. And they're SO SMALL. What a rip-off.

Mr Mike Chan, I don't think your donuts are less sweet lorh. Who are you trying to kid?

On the serious side, this is precisely why good customer service is so important. It takes just one disgruntled customer to take her dissatisfaction to the Net and presto! One black smear on your shiny little apple.

I've worked in the customer service industry before. When I first started out, some of the staff had a little disagreement with a customer. That was in Miri, and it was only with ONE customer - an old Malay guy. One week later, we received a call from HQ in KL saying that a customer complained about rude service in the Miri outlet and we were interrogated from top to bottom on what actually happened and how we should have dealt with the matter AND WHY WE SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER get into a disagreement with a customer because it takes just one tiny bad incident to tarnish the good name of the company.

It was a pretty humbling experience.

Sago worms

2008-04-23T04:52:00.005-07:00

My colleague N knows my love for sago worms and fried up a small batch for me. My father and I went through half the container before I remembered to take a photo of the worms.

Sago worms... lemak berkrim disukai ramai. Yums!

This would probably enrage animal conservationists, but I do enjoy eating exotic meat. So far the weirdest meats I've eaten are porcupine, bats, mouse deer and monitor lizard. Bat meat was probably the freakiest. The chef accidentally fried one of the bat's head together with the meat. It looked like a small gargoyle head equipped with a mouthful of fangs. The meat itself was nothing to shout about. There were more bones than meat, and my father's friend kept encouraging us to eat the stretch on skin on the wings. Not very pleasant.

Monitor lizard was goooooooooooood. Boiled in soup with kei chi (wolfberries), the meat was extremely smooth and tender. But I seldom hear of people eating monitor lizard anymore. I don't think monitors are endangered. The last time I went down to Satang Island, there was a huge monitor lizard on the loose that was eating protected turtle eggs.

Huge monitor lizard = lots of soft, tender meat. Hmm...

I think monitor lizards are one of the things people don't admit to eating. Like cats and dogs. People eat them as well, but nobody wants to admit that they do. I've never eaten cats, but I had dog meat a long, long time ago. I think I was eight or nine back then. The meat was cooked with soy sauce and ginger, much like how one would prepare venison.

Perhaps I should stop here. I'm only reinforcing the theory that Chinese people will eat anything.

Actually I think they do.

Bobby says hello.
I think he's got a little bit of Spitz in him.
No, he's not for eating.

I need somebody to volunteer to be my human punching bag

2008-04-21T00:14:00.004-07:00

Listening to Layla's Kaylif's Shakespeare in Love (yes, very retro I know) while wiki-ing up Gus Van Sant... God, I love his movies so much.

Did you know that he directed My Own Private Idaho, starring Keanu Reeves and River Phoenix?

I never forgave River Phoenix for dying just when I was beginning to love him. He's absolutely gorgeous. And all his siblings have beautiful names.

Rain.

Summer.

Liberty.

I mean, there's no way I'm going to name myself or my future kids Rain because it'll look really weird (like those ah lian Hongkie girls calling themselves Coco, Bobo, or Jojo), but Rain Phoenix is a really cool name.

And don't you simply hate it when somebody bursts your bubble?

I have never second-guessed myself so much in my whole life. I wish I could up and leave like I always did before, but now I can't. I dare not. I think I'm trapped in some weird fucked up comfort zone. What IS a comfort zone anyway? I don't find it the least bit comfortable. Those psychobabblists should rename it quicksand zone or rat glue zone. Once you've gotten yourself trapped, it's a total bitch to get yourself out again.

Oh and my birthday is in, what, 10 more days and all I can think of right now is that thanks to the poor ventilation at Pizza Hut, my clothes currently stink of food and every time I turn slightly, I catch a whiff of something slightly oily and it makes me wanna puke.

I think I'm slightly depressed at the moment.

Ovulation sucks.

I need a cigarette.

Things to do before I die

2008-04-17T18:27:00.002-07:00

1. Visit Casablanca in Morocco.

2. Learn how to play the saxophone.

3. Watch Liverpool play at Anfield.

4. Watch Argentina play in a World Cup match.

5. Go for at least one cosmetic surgery.

6. Attend a real jazz concert.

7. Dine at Masa. At US$300 per head (excluding drinks, tax or tips) it is one of New York's most expensive and exclusive Japanese restaurants.

8. Be a guest on either Hell's Kitchen or the F-Word. Eat me, Mr Ramsay.

9. Own a pet shop.

10. Porsche 911 Turbo or 997 (own, drive, whatever).

11. Be happy.

Book wish list

2008-04-11T20:16:00.006-07:00

Arthur Spiderwick's Field Guide to the Fantastical World Around You
Author: Holly Black

Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter Witch
Author: Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett
(Get it cheap here)

The Dark Tower series:
Author: Stephen King

The Gunslinger (Get it cheap here)
The Drawing of Three (Get it cheap here)
The Waste Lands (Get it cheap here)
Wizard and Glass (Get it cheap here)
Wolves of the Calla (Get it cheap here)
Song of Susannah (Get it cheap here)
The Dark Tower (Get it cheap here)

I've got all three Philip Pullman books (Golden Compass, Subtle Knife, Amber Spyglass) and my precious Neil Gaiman collection stands at 7 - Anansi Boys and Smoke and Mirrors were the latest additions.

Books make me so so so so sooooooooooooo happy.

The little furry diva

2008-04-10T19:44:00.012-07:00

I hate Mondays

2008-04-07T00:54:00.002-07:00

One of the sweetest thing a guy ever did for me was to write me a poem.

Sure, anyone can write a poem... even of the roses are red, violets are blue variety, but it takes a HUGE amount of guts to compose a loooooooong romantic poem in English when you know very well your English sucks.

It's so fucking sweet when a guy does something for you even when he knows damn well he's not good at it or doesn't like it.

And excuse me for not blogging for so long. My neopet demands my full attention.

My current lecturer has a very weird attitude about smoking. It's like she's half obsessed, half paranoid about it. She enjoys asking students whether they smoke, even the most mousy, nerdy ones who you know would rather die than pick up a cigarette. At the same time, she would vehemently claim that she doesn't smoke, but she's EXTREMELY FINE with people who do, because alot of her good friends are smokers.

And then she told the whole class that once when she was working with a big multinational company, she purposely got her colleague to take a picture of her holding a cigarette during some company event so that her bosses would think she's a high achiever.

I have no bloody idea how she managed to come up with the formula that smokers = focus, determined, high achievers.

At first I found it mildly amusing, but after awhile, I found it rather creepy. Like, right in the middle of class she started asking me what brand of cigarettes I smoked and how many sticks do I smoke in a day and why did I start smoking. Then the next second, she would say something like, "Yes, smoking is very relaxing. I mean, I HEARD that smoking is very relaxing and it can help you forget your problems so maybe it can be good for you that way. I don't know lah, obviously I don't smoke but alot of my friends do and I'm fine with it. *Turns to next student* So, do you smoke?"

So creepy!